Constable: Timberlake, McConaughey moving to suburbs, according to 'news'
According to my Facebook "news" feed, performing artist and actor Justin Timberlake has a thing for the women of Mount Prospect.
"From my experience in Mount Prospect, the women there have the entire package, ya know?," Timberlake is quoted as telling a reporter.
That sounds so Justin, but still strikes me as odd considering the A-list celebrity is married to actress Jessica Biel and they have a son named Silas. How did Timberlake get enough experience with the women of Mount Prospect to even form an opinion, and why did he feel compelled to share it with all of us on Facebook?
Perhaps, Timberlake was hanging with Matthew McConaughey, who, according to another news story on Facebook, is moving to Palatine.
"I'm just tired of the L.A. lifestyle and the fake people, honestly, and I feel like, at this point in my life, I'd rather just live in a place full of real, genuine people," McConaughey is quoted in this story as saying. "I've been to Palatine a few times over the years and the people there are real."
You'd have thought the Daily Herald would have run a photo or two of McConaughey mingling with the real people of Palatine during the years, but you know how the media find McConaughey far too conservative (or maybe it's too liberal) to give him publicity. The Oscar-winning actor is married to Camila Alves, a stunningly gorgeous Brazilian-American model and fashion designer, and the couple have three children and a big home in Austin, Texas, so it would seem as if he already has an escape from the L.A. lifestyle. But Palatine beckons.
"I'm not retiring, I'm just looking for a change in life and I think I've found that in Palatine," McConaughey says.
In a world where people are skeptical of the mainstream media but believe whatever they read online, more than 100 Facebook commenters chimed in about McConaughey's desire to buy a house in Palatine.
"It's a wonderful town with nice people," reads a Facebook comment from a retired teacher who lives in Palatine. "Matthew comes at a special time. Palatine is celebrating its 150th anniversary this year."
Others invite McConaughey to grab some grub at Napoli Pizza, El Toreo, Heng Wing or Spunky Dunkers, join Saturday's Earth Day celebration and cleanup at Camp Alphonse in the Deer Grove Forest Preserve, worship at St. Thomas Church, volunteer at Little City or take his kids to a wonderful pediatrician who grew up in Palatine but now works in Buffalo Grove.
It all makes sense if you saw the earlier news story in your Facebook feed noting that fellow Oscar-winner Leonardo DiCaprio was moving to Woodstock. Or maybe it was Wheaton. Or Wheeling. Or Bartlett. Or Schaumburg. I do remember reading that Bill Murray already had laid claim to Bolingbrook.
Many online services now offer all the news that's fit to fake. The made-up story about McConaughey came from KUPR 7 News. But it could have come from WCPM 3 News, WLEB 21, or fake news "satire" sites such as McKenzie Post, Headline Brief or Feednewz. "Sharing the phony news reports did no direct harm, but contributed to an atmosphere in which spreading misinformation was rewarded by advertising revenue, thus encouraging additional hoax purveyors to get in on what appeared to be a very lucrative racket," reports Snopes, the website that sets the standard for debunking rumors and online mischief.
Let's hope somebody gets to the bottom of that story about "The Celebrity Apprentice" host Donald Trump saying he "cherishes" the women of New York and is making plans to move into a big house in Washington, D.C.