80 days, 80 ways to wish family matriarch happy birthday
While the surprise party on her 70th birthday went well, the family of Hampshire's Lois Kartheiser knew they couldn't repeat that for her 80th birthday today.
"She did not want a party," says Mary Jedlovec, 60, of Warrenville, the oldest of Kartheiser's 10 children. "She only wanted a little family get-together."
But when you are the matriarch of a family that boasts 10 kids, 27 grandchildren, five great-grandchildren and untold nieces, nephews, cousins and close friends, there is nothing little about family get-togethers. So dozens of them will gather in the family's Hampshire barn today for a formal party.
However, the surprise element of this birthday has been a daily occurrence for months.
"Starting on July 11, 2007, each person was designated a day to do something special for Mom," explains daughter Patty Zeyen, 42, an accountant from Batavia. "That something special could be a simple phone call to say hello and wish her happy birthday, or sending her a birthday card, taking Mom to breakfast or lunch or creating homemade gifts to give to her."
The idea of 80 gifts in 80 days came from daughter Diane Keeney of Minnesota, who orchestrated a chart more complicated than the Cubs' playoff scenarios.
"We pulled together a huge calendar that went out three days before (the gifts began)," says oldest granddaughter Kelly Lenz, 39, of Minnesota.
On July 11, good friend Jan surprised Kartheiser by taking her to lunch. The next day, son-in-law Joe brought her a dozen roses and took her to breakfast. Then 4-year-old Luke painted a special picture for his grandma. Then came a card from grandchild Brian in Colorado.
And on and on -- phone calls and art projects, flowers and pizza, balloons and pie, a homemade "family folklore" book and an "80" book done by a fourth-grade class.
There were shopping trips with jewelry, visits to the old neighborhoods in Winfield and Broadview, car washes and pedicures, and lunch in Chicago, the city where Kartheiser and husband John had their first date.
John Kartheiser, who also dedicated himself to his loving family, died in 1999. The family still gathers at the farm for Thanksgiving and other events, when relatives of all generations join in games of Hearts and Connect Four.
Friday's penultimate birthday gift was a trip to Chicago with youngest daughter Teresa Smagacz, 39, of West Chicago.
"She is wonderful. It's great that her birthday is celebrated in 80 days instead of just one and all over with," says Smagacz. Born on the day after Valentine's Day, Smagacz baked her mom a heart-shaped cake.
"She made me a heart cake every birthday for my whole life," Smagacz says. "I'm making a two-layered heart shape cake. The top layer is her heart: "'Your heart is within me forever.' "
It's difficult to maintain something this complicated for 80 days through several states and four generations for a woman known as Lois, mom, grandma and GG (for great-grandmother). But there's been only a couple of glitches by busy (and forgetful) college kids.
"The two who missed will never live it down," Lenz says.
And the guest of honor has been loving it all.
"She's in excellent health," Jedlovec says. "She's gorgeous. Does she look 80 to you?"
The whole thing has gone so wonderfully that the family is thinking ahead. With the ever-growing list of family and friends, filling 90 days for that 90th birthday should be no problem.