Gripes on grapes: Common complaints about wine answered

You say you’ve got complaints about wine: It’s too complicated. You don’t know what it tastes like. And what’s a wine bar anyway? Well, Dear Reader, if you’ve got gripes, I’ve got gripes too.

For instance, it really gets my goat when people say:

“You can serve any wine with any food.”

Sure, you can. You can also serve cocktail sauce on ice cream, but try it on your next buffet and see how many takers you get.

Wine is like the sauce, seasoning, or spice that accents food flavors. It can be as delicious as your favorite topping on ice cream, or as off-putting as that cocktail sauce. While aiding digestion, a good wine pairing adds pop to food flavors, turns tough meat into juicy mouthfuls, stimulates conversation and can turn an average meal into a special occasion. Why deny yourself?

To get started, here are some tried-and-true pairings: Pinot Grigio with light, lemony dishes like shrimp. Chardonnay with buttery dishes, even butter-basted steak. Sauvignon Blanc with olive oil or herbed dishes, even meat with salsa verde. Light reds, such as Pinot Noir and Rosè, with light protein like turkey, salmon and pork. Rich reds, like Cabernet Sauvignon, with red meats. For spicy dishes, serve a delicately sweet wine, including many Rieslings. For dessert, serve a very sweet wine, such as Moscato d’Asti.

For a laboratory of wine and food experimentation, find a wine bar. In Chicago, my go-to is Uvae Kitchen (5553 N. Clark St.), where guests can rely on staff recommendations, taste wines before purchase and mix-and-match 3-, 6- and 9-ounce wine pours with plates of all sizes. Try their mussels ($24) with a French Sauvignon Blanc ($6, 3-ounce pour) and a Slovenian Pinot Noir ($7, 3-ounce pour).

“Wine lingo is too complicated.”

Wine has been part of human civilization since human civilization began, featured in religion, science, visual arts and poetry, with 125 references in Homer’s The Odyssey, (circa 725 BCE), including 12 references to “wine dark seas” — not “soda pop-dark” or even “grape-dark.” Wine is woven throughout humankind’s abstract and descriptive language, a language that makes our species unique among all others. With thousands of years in the making, complexity should be expected.

To get started, learn a few grape names, prominently Chardonnay and Cabernet Sauvignon. Next, learn the grape’s varying soils (such as rocky or clay), climates (cool or warm) and production techniques (including maturation). For flavors, start with color (red, white, rosè), sweetness (sweet or dry), weight in the mouth (light or rich) and any fruit flavor (for instance lemons or raspberries).

For perspective, according to sports historians, the first official soccer match was played in the 1800s. Can someone explain to me what false nine, two-legged match, tiki-taka or att vara naken med målvakten mean? The World Cup’s terminology may have been baffling, but it gave fans laughs, shared experiences and fun memories. I didn’t hear any complaints. I can’t wait to drop “squeaky bum time” into a conversation with friends.

When you come upon a new wine word, I’ll repeat what my parents told me as a child learning vocabulary: “Look it up.”

“I don’t know what wine I like.”

Next time you taste a wine you like, snap a picture with your phone, add a caption to jog your memory and show it to your wine merchant. (See next section.)

“I don’t know where to shop for wine.”

You can’t keep up with wine’s intricacies, and neither can I! So I rely on trusted wine merchants to keep me abreast of wine’s trends, selection and factoids, as well as to direct me toward wine that fits my palate, menu and pocketbook. To get started, see my pointers on how to talk to a wine merchant and why it’s great to be a wine buyer in the Chicago area.

Major Chicagoland chains, including 47 Binny’s Beverage Depot locations, offer massive selection and generally good advice. For a fine-tuned approach, turn to small wine shops, with carefully chosen selections and in-depth wine chat. As a North Side Chicagoan, one of my favorites is Independent Spirits, Inc., 5947 N. Broadway.

And for another ancient opinion on wine, the Roman poet Horace is known to have said, “No poem was ever written by a drinker of water.”

• Mary Ross is an Advanced Sommelier (Court of Master Sommeliers), a Certified Wine Educator (Society of Wine Educators) and a recipient of Wine Spectator’s “Grand Award of Excellence.” Write to her at food@dailyherald.com.