No sports? No problem! A look at Zoom's future

The mind boggles just thinking about it.

A year ago today, 90% of the population would probably have been unfamiliar with Zoom. Only the gods and goddesses of the high-tech world have been privy to this technology. But, of course, all that changed due to the ravages of COVID-19.

And now? Zoom has entered the every day American life, taking its rightful place (well, almost) right next to baseball, hot dogs, apple pie and Chevrolet.

Everybody's doing it. We meet and greet friends and families through Zoom. We conduct business meetings, board meetings, conferences, and brainstorming sessions through Zoom. We even "see" the doctor through Zoom. Or maybe even your psychologist, marriage counselor, or community service director, depending on your personal preference or need.

Heck, I don't even know if Zoom is a noun, a verb or, God forbid, an adverb (I've always had an adversarial relationship with adverbs). Better yet, should Z(z)oom be capitalized or lowercase? I have no idea, but thank goodness for professional editors in this case.

Now here is the really interesting thing to ponder. What is the future of Zoom? We know where it is now, but what will it look like in months, or even years, to come?

Let's let the imagination run wild for a moment and ponder some of these "Coach's Corner" possible creations:

Red Zoom: The National Football League started a channel a few years back called the "Red Zone." Basically, it takes you from game to game to catch key, exciting moments as they are about to happen. Now Red Zoom can do the same for Zoom meetings. Just tap in to tune in, and you will get to see highlights of the most dramatic Zoom meeting moments right as they are about to happen. Imagine the excitement!

Re-Zoom: This high-tech new feature will allow you to go back and replay all the highlights of your past Zoom meetings. Think of the fun you will have as you pause, fast forward, and rewind your day away while capturing some of your favorite Zoom moments from past conversations or meetings.

Peek-A-Zoom: Got some free time to browse? Bored with Twitter and Facebook? Peek-A-Zoom will allow you to wander the internet and take quick sneak peeks at other people's Zoom meetings. Just think of the entertainment you will get from listening to other folks' personal conversations, maybe even family squabbles or, better yet, business meetings with new and exciting ideas. Don't get too carried away though, because there will be a one-minute limit to your "sneak peek" at each site. Privacy dictates.

Zoom-Cations: Can't take your desired vacation? Finances got you down? Or maybe you are just too tired to plan it all. No problem, because Zoom-Cations lets you experience the vacation through others. Anywhere you want to go. Let's say Italy is your dream destination. Zoom-Cation experts will lead you on visits to museums, artifacts, and historical landmarks. Ditto for Hawaii, The Grand Canyon, Ireland or whatever destination you want to experience. They will even head to the beach or the mountains - whatever your little travel heart desires. The special, high-definition technology lets the viewer really get the feel of being there - even though you are actually just sitting on your couch and munching on a bag of chips. But, hey, look at the money you'll be saving!

Adult-A-Zoom: Takes adult entertainment to the interactive level. No explanation necessary. Certainly not in this newspaper.

Zoom-A-Rang: This one has all kinds of creative potential. Here is how it might work. Let's say you have a Zoom meeting on a particular topic, but now you are interested in getting more information about that subject. All you do is plug in the subject and Zoom-A-Rang will do the rest. It will blast you out into the internet, plugging you into different Zoom meetings on similar subjects. You may get a few minutes in each Zoom meeting, one after another, until you eventually boomerang back to your original meeting. When you arrive back, you will have new, innovative ways of looking at your own discussion.

Pre-Zoom: Like Re-Zoom, except it gives you previews of upcoming Zoom meetings/sessions.

Hall Of Zoom: Isn't it just a matter of time before we have the Hall of Fame version of Zoom? A site where you can go to see the history of some of the most significant and life-changing Zoom meetings and " Zoom moments."

I-Zoom: We all like to talk to ourselves sometimes, right? Internal deliberations, self motivation etc. Now through the wonders of I-Zoom, you can actually see yourself on screen as you talk to yourself! A brilliant way to spruce up your "self-reflections." Note: This one is recommended for home use only.

Last Zoom Standing: A marathon runner's dream come true! This is an elimination competition where all participants - with their computers hooked into Zoom - would start at the exact same time running on a treadmill at a predesignated speed. Runners keep going as long as they can, meanwhile watching others on-screen drop out through exhaustion. This grueling test of endurance and pain threshold doesn't end until the last one is still running on the treadmill.

So there you have it. On a slow sports week, Coach's Corner goes "zooming" off into the future with a few potential ideas.

Brilliant, I say. What could possibly go wrong?

• Jon Cohn of Glenview is a coach, retired PE teacher, sports official and prep sports fan.