If you were Jay Cutler, how worried would you be Monday night?

(Please don’t) Ring my bell:

I have to admit I’m freaking out a little about Jay Cutler’s health Monday night against the Giants at The Meadowlands.

Three words: Run. The. Ball.

Six more words: Put. In. The. Backup. Quarterback. Quickly.

That’s nine words in total, one for each first-half sack last season by the Giants.

Be honest:

You still don’t know whether to give the White Sox your heart, do you?

Stop (not) making sense:

Mike Martz’s apparent dislike of Caleb Hanie vs. Jim Hendry’s initial overlike (new word) of Milton Bradley.

Discuss.

Flying officer Jim Cavanaugh:

Concerts, Air and Water Show, Cubs-Cards, Sox-Rangers ... when it comes to traffic this weekend — serenity now.

Wishful thinking:

The Bulls released their preseason schedule Thursday and they open Oct. 10 against the Bobcats.

But really, c’mon. Think that’s going to happen?

Won’t be the last:

Mike Jacobs became the first player suspended by Major League Baseball for a positive HGH test.

The minor-league first baseman received a 50-game suspension and was immediately released by the Colorado Rockies.

Be prepared for more.

This just in ... and it’s a final:

Fielders 1, Fielders 0.

What in the name of Lake County is going on here?

Behind the curtain:

Over the Million weekend at Arlington Park, there were the usual handful of crucial decisions made by the stewards that directly affected the outcome of races.

Got me thinking: isn’t it time the stewards themselves — and not track announcer John Dooley — were required to pop up on the in-house TVs with telestrators in hand and actually explain the reasoning behind their decisions?

Great guy, great number:

Jim Thome’s 600th home run did not get enough notice, and that’s just a shame.

Thanks a lot, steroids era.

Who would’ve guessed?

According to the TV ratings, not many people watched the PGA Championship last weekend, but if you caught the final round — especially the back nine and the playoff between Keegan Bradley and Jason Dufner — you have to admit it was pretty riveting stuff.

Hello? Anyone?

Awfully quiet on the Andy Fantuz front.

Just a little late:

I guess it was cool to see Alfonso Soriano get on Carlos Zambrano for his antics in Atlanta, but to call that leadership? Um, that’s a bit of a stretch.

Can Soriano be a leader? A guy who really only does one thing decently? Better make that two. No one poses at the plate any better.

BTW:

How come you never see the shift put on for a right-handed pull hitter?

Lamenting in Lemont:

Tiger Woods failing to qualify for golf’s postseason — the FedEx Cup playoffs — man, that’s still a hard concept to fathom.

And it’s bad news for the BMW Championship at Cog Hill, which can use all the publicity — and big name players — it can get.

Not that Woods would have advanced that far, but ...

The good news is ...:

... that Illinois-based golfers Mark Wilson (Elmhurst), D.A. Points (Pekin) and Kevin Streelman (Winfield/Wheaton) are comfortably in the playoff field.

He said it:

“He’s the most unprofessional little scaredy-cat I’ve ever seen in my life. He won’t even fight me like a man. So if somebody will text me his address, I’ll go visit him at his house and show him what he really needs. He needs a whooping, and I’m going to give it to him.” — NASCAR driver Boris Said, following a post-race scuffle with Greg Biffle at Watkins Glen