Real world sometimes better than virtual one

I am amazed at all the things that my adult children, not to mention my grandchildren, can do with a computer or smartphone.

Technical literacy has become a necessary job skill in almost all vocations and will be a necessary life skill in the not-too-distant future.

On the other hand, there are some things I encourage my children to experience in the real world. For as convenient, expansive and powerful as the virtual world of the computer has become, it offers only a limited exposure to what a well-rounded and fulfilling life should be.

Many of us, for example, are excited about the ease of communicating with old friends and making new friends via the Internet. It also doesn't take long to discover something is missing from electronic relationships — not to mention the commonly known risks associated with developing new relationships solely through email, chat rooms or Facebook. Even Skype can leave us feeling incomplete.

There is something special about talking to friends face-to-face and spending time with them in person. An entire spectrum of relating takes place outside the limits of typed words on a screen. And that spectrum can only be explored in the real world.

In fact, there is some preliminary evidence that children who socialize primarily through the computer or other electronic devices experience an increased incidence of isolation, poor social skill development, depression and other related difficulties.

For as much as I appreciate the convenience of ordering a book online, I want my children to experience the pure pleasure of an hour or so spent browsing through an actual brick-and-mortar bookstore.

There is something delightful about wandering row upon row of shelves filled to overflowing with books that can be touched and explored. The visual, tactile and even olfactory impact of a good book store cannot be duplicated electronically. The joy our children may find in such an adventure can contribute significantly to their mastery of and enjoyment of reading.

I also am amazed at the innovative and entertaining electronic games available for children and adults. As I've watched people interact with all this electronic material, however, I again sense something missing.

There really is a difference to sitting down, shuffling a pack of cards and playing solitaire. Playing checkers or chess with a real board, game pieces and opponent is different from doing so with a computer, even when you are electronically linked to a playing partner.

We experience something hard to describe, but something to which we all can relate.

I want my children to learn to write long hand. I want them to be able to take pen in hand and compose on paper their innermost thoughts and feelings. I want them to be able to offer others the intimacy of a handwritten card, note or letter. Knowing how to use a keyboard to draft a document will certainly be among their skills, but there is artistry in writing with pen and paper that is qualitatively different for both writer and reader.

As technological innovations continue, I am sure we will find even more uses for computers and other electronic gadgets. I am also sure that there will always be a category of experiences whose complexity and richness simply cannot be electronically captured or replicated. It is our responsibility as parents to help our children understand this.

Ÿ The Rev. Ken Potts' book “Mix, Don't Blend: A Guide to Dating, Engagement, and Remarriage with Children” is available through book retailers.