Relationship advice from the pros
Dear June and Bud: Is there any relationship advice you can give the rest of us? Signed, Hopeful June: Sure, lots. After 63 years, we#146;ve had time to learn in our own relationship, and as you get older you get smarter.
First of all, get to know the good and the bad about the other person and decide if you can live with it, because you can#146;t change someone else.
Bud: Accept and appreciate the differences between you. June likes to constantly be achieving something. She#146;s the secretary, the scheduler, bill payer. She does our taxes.
June: Bud helps with housework, cooks, fills the dishwasher and always asks #145;What can I do?#146; We don#146;t believe in defined rules or chores.
Bud: When one person does all the work, it builds resentment.
June: Treat each other with respect. Give the other person privacy. Don#146;t forget common courtesy #8212; say excuse me, please and thank you. Show appreciation, pay a compliment. Ask for your partner#146;s advice. Make your partner feel valued. People stop paying attention to each other. We take walks together and hold hands as much as we can. Even with friends, you have to water that friendship in order to have it continually bloom. Forget certain things. You don#146;t have to be right all the time.
Bud: Don#146;t look for arguments and never go to bed mad. Learn to apologize.
Bud and June: Have a wish list. Save for something. If you have to borrow, make it a very short term loan and have a plan to pay it back. We never owed anyone. We drive a 1989 Toyota.
#8212; Submitted by Carolyn Staven