Maintenance is critical for cars — and people

I once worked with this guy who didn’t take care of his cars.

He wouldn’t add oil or coolant until the dashboard warning light had been on for a few weeks. Bald tires stayed on until they blew. Engine running rough? Wait ’til it stops running altogether. Wash and wax? More like rain and dirt.

Some of us would give the guy a hard time, but there was just no convincing him that it was worth the time and effort to maintain his cars.

“They break, I fix ’em,” he would say. “The rest of the time I don’t want to be bothered with ’em.”

Not surprisingly, my friend spent a good many hours by the side of the road waiting for tow trucks. And when one of his cars finally did make it into the shop, the cost to fix all that had gone wrong was pretty steep. He wound up going through a good many cars, but he was bound and determined to do it his way.

Even if we know almost nothing about cars, we can recognize the folly in my friend’s attitude. You don’t have to be a do-it-yourself mechanic or an auto buff to know that cars have to be taken care of and that little problems just become bigger problems if we ignore them.

Somehow, though, many of us disconnect such common sense when it comes to other areas of our lives. We cheat our bodies of proper sleep, nutrition and exercise. We skip a regular health exam. We haven’t read a book in years. We put off dealing with a disagreement with our best friend. We shortchange the kids (“I’ll spend more time with them next summer, really!”). We try to ignore the problems in our marriage, hoping they will fix themselves. We avoid thinking about such things as the meaning of our lives, faith, what makes it all worthwhile — and we can get away with such neglect for quite awhile.

We can cruise through our teens, 20s and maybe even our 30s by just refusing to deal with ourselves, our relationships or our lives. Sooner or later, it all catches up to us.

We start to put on weight, suffer from chronic fatigue or exhibit all sorts of stress symptoms. Our friends seem less available, our kids have grown up without us, our spouse begins to talk about leaving. Our work seems meaningless, we wonder what we are doing and why.

If things get bad enough, some of us even break down. That’s the time many of us finally decide to get help — which is as crazy as my friend never taking care of his car. We wait until things have gotten so bad we can’t stand it anymore, then decide to do something about it.

That is, if we can do something about it. There’s such a thing as waiting too long, and some things in life just can’t be fixed.

We can do irreparable damage to our body, mind, relationships and spirit. And even if the damage can be repaired, the cost in time, money and pain can be overwhelming.

Whether it’s an exercise program, going back to school, a job change, reaching out to our friends or using a marriage counselor, let’s not wait any longer.

Whatever it is we need to do, it probably won’t be as hard as we think, and it sure isn’t going to get any easier if we keep putting it off. Peoples’ lives are not as easily put back together as cars.

Ÿ The Rev. Ken Potts’ book “Mix, Don’t Blend: A Guide to Dating, Engagement, and Remarriage with Children” is available through book retailers.