Sports doesn't deserve to police itself anymore
Agreeing with anybody in Congress on anything is dubious these days.
You know, considering politicians are about as popular as, say, sports writers are.
Yet here I am agreeing with Sen. Arlen Specter that an independent investigator should investigate the NFL's investigation of Spygate.
It's not that I don't trust NFL Commissioner Roger Goodell. It's that I don't trust anyone in sports any more than I trust a car salesman's initial number.
Arguments have been made against government involvement in sports. The latest came from Sen. Lindsey Graham, who said Americans believe Congress has more important issues to address.
Sure it does. Among them are terrorism, gas prices, two wars, food prices, global warming, health-care costs and Angelina Jolie's latest pregnancy.
Oh, wait, scratch that last one as none of our business. But sports are. Athletes influence the behavior of kids big and small from schoolrooms to boardrooms and schoolyards to singles bars.
Cheating might have spread from sports to the rest of society or from the rest of society to sports, but either way our ethical decay is a national embarrassment.
Anyway, it isn't as if the economy and foreign affairs are new to government. Public servants have had decades to mess them up.
Perhaps working on sports matters could serve as training wheels for confronting other serious matters.
(Hey, if nothing else, busy work could consume lawmaker time otherwise spent on visits to D.C. brothels, tapping a shoe in a rest-room stall or -- yikes! -- running for president.)
Ah, but I come today not to tease Congress but to tweak sports.
For too long these games and the people who play them have been allowed to legislate, execute and adjudicate themselves.
Look where that left us last week alone -- an ongoing cheating saga involving Patriots head coach Bill Belichick, USC basketball star O.J. Mayo accused of accepting illegal aid from an agent, and Kansas basketball star Darrell Arthur's high school grades allegedly altered.
Major League Baseball tolerated the use of performance enhancers. Tennis faces a fixing scandal. College sports ideals are askew. Please, don't get me started on the Olympics, or tell me nobody cheats at golf.
Baseball players lie about their age. Basketball players lie about their height. Applicants for sports jobs lie about their credentials.
If you ain't cheating, you ain't trying, right? No wonder honesty and nobility in sports are starting to look like myth and fable.
Sports once were perceived as models of integrity. Now they're models of what not to do.
Sports have served no master for too long. They have forfeited the privilege. Somebody else has to keep them honest.
Sports figures no longer can be trusted to police themselves. I'd nominate journalists for the job if our credibility were any better.
It's debatable whether Congress is the appropriate alternative, since this might be like the corrupt leading the corrupt.
But if Congress wants to take time from other activities, that's fine with me.
Banned substances still would be prevalent in baseball if Congress hadn't intervened. Now, I agree with Sen. Specter that an independent investigation is the only way to be sure the NFL isn't covering up anything in Spygate.
A federal Secretary of Sports never seemed like a good idea, but the occasional Congressional peek isn't a bad idea.
mimrem@dailyherald.com