O'Donnell: DeRozan OK, but NBA All-Star Game in Cleveland is no place for polkas, pierogies
THERE MIGHT BE SOMETHING more pointless than the four major All-Star competitions pockmarking the TV sports landscape.
But if there is, a mildly clever name would have to be crafted to cover its bloated hollowness - something better than "The Beijing Winter Olympics."
The NFL and the NHL had the GPS - "Global Party Sense" - to hold their annual fizzlers in Las Vegas earlier this month.
Unfortunately, regarding both, what happened in Vegas didn't stay in Vegas.
SUNDAY, THE NBA ROLLS its bouncing Wilsons into one of the drained capitals of The Rust Belt - Cleveland, Ohio.
As a glitzy adjunct to Black History Month, the weekend is all that it could be.
Finding a country music singer in the entertainment lineup is as futile a pursuit as counting the number of Emmys that Demond Wilson won for "Sanford and Son" and "Baby ... I'm Back!"
In Cleveland, some would even settle for holograms of "Polka King" Frankie Yankovic.
TURNER SPORTS IS ALL OUT with end line to thankful end line coverage of much of it.
That "much" will culminate with the tongue-in-fling mainliner, the NBA All-Star Game Sunday (TBS and TNT, 7 p.m.)
TBS will blatantly borrow from ESPN2's "Manningcast" and feature Charles Barkley, Draymond Green and Shaquille O'Neal in "an alternative broadcast."
TNT will go "more conventional" with Kevin Harlan - who hits crescendo voice at the sight of a ball boy mopping up a sweat spot - alongside Reggie Miller and Dwyane Wade.
VEGAS PROJECTIONISTS HAVE the over/under - the total number of points scored by both teams - at 321½.
That's reasonable, considering the last five renewals have hit: 320, 312, 342, 293 and 374.
Team LeBron has won the last four. So that makes it perfectly plausible gambling cliff dwellers are laying 5½ points to get LBJ and crew at Rocket Mortgage FieldHouse.
Most intriguing sidebar will be if members of both teams try to block all shots by James Harden, apparently the most loathed ball-dominant ego in the game.
FOR BULLS FANS, the No. 1 hope is that all-everything DeMar DeRozan simply makes it out of "The 216" healthy and whole.
As a matter of fact, if DeRozan had conveniently missed his limo to "The ORD" Friday, very few in "The 312" would be complaining.
Less than 10% of the 101 million who watched last Sunday's Super Bowl 56 between the Rams and the Bengals are expected to tune in.
And Monday morning, the bouncing Wilsons will be gone and Cleveland will be back to the pigeons decorating Public Square and memories of Sokolowski's Pierogi Inn.
DANDY MYSTERY UNFOLDING with the tale of a major profile of Jay Mariotti produced by Bob Kravitz of The Athletic that now apparently won't run.
Kravitz broke ground on the piece last fall. The New Trier High grad is a credible sports journalist of long-standing best known for his work as a columnist with The Indianapolis Star.
The publication date of the feature kept getting pushed back. Shortly after The New York Times announced its $550M cash purchase of the online daily, the initiative got lost.
The great irony is that if the passionate Mariotti could ever fully rehabilitate his professional image - and it is said the Kravitz effort would have helped - he'd be a significant asset to the weighty dot.com.
As it is, The Athletic is a bunch of suburbs in search of a downtown national columnist.
And even on a short leash, Mariotti - who still flashes some polarizing 103 mph heat at substack.com - would be as good as it currently can get.
STREET-BEATIN': Unchained summary of the United States, NBC Sports and those woeful 2022 Beijing Winter Games: The U.S. never should have been there. But with midterm elections less than nine months away, President Joe Biden lacks sufficient majority capital to have ordered a boycott. ...
By 2021 standards, it takes nine network telecasts of World Series games to equal the audience of one Super Bowl. All the more reason stooge MLB commissioner Rob Manfred and the smug elitists he answers to should do everything possible to muck up the 2022 season and further diminish the game. ...
Neil Funk was honored by the Bulls at a recent home game for his amazing 29 seasons as one of the team's play-by-play men. To his credit, Funk consistently maintained his professionalism and affability despite the fact he knew he never came close to winning over the Jim Durham faithful. (And that's all on Jerry Reinsdorf.) ...
Jeff Nuich, the masterful sports media relations ace, is set to begin a new gig with the nonprofit Midtown/Metro Educational Foundation. He will elevate the organization. His departure from NBC Sports Chicago still plagues Kevin Cross and the operation's budget poltroons. ...
Among those rostered for the NBA All-Star Celebrity Game in Cleveland were such household names as Noah Carlock, Matt James, Annuel AA and Anjali Ranadive. Meaning Phil Donahue, Dennis Kucinich, Dorothy Fuldheim and Ghoulardi mustn't have been available. ...
And all-time L.A. Times racing writer Bill Christine, talking about his startup years with the East St. Louis (Ill.) Journal: "I wrote a weekly column about boating on the Mississippi called, 'Out With the Buoys.' "
• Jim O'Donnell's Sports & Media column appears Thursday and Sunday. Reach him at jimodonnelldh@yahoo.com.