Do you know where your kids are?

I read Chuck Goudie's Aug. 30 column, "After Oswego," with relief. For months, as I followed the story about the tragic deaths of the young teens in Oswego caused by hitching a ride with a drunken driver, I found myself biting my tongue.

Mr. Goudie said what I had been thinking, but was afraid to say out loud, "What on earth were those children (yes, children) doing out at 2:30 a.m.?"

I dare not add salt to the wounds of the already grieving parents, but so wanted to speak those words that I only uttered in a whisper to my adult daughter just yesterday. What a relief that he said it first. From something so tragic comes a profound lesson for all parents: Do you know where your children are?

As an old mom, the mother of two adult children, a 12-year-old and grandmother of two, you can say I have been around the block more than a couple of times. I find it easy to say no. It wasn't easy at first, but now I find it second nature. As a matter of fact, I often just say no before the question is even finished, frustrating my "tween" to no end.

He's embarrassed when I insist on questioning his friends' parents before he is allowed to do anything, and I don't care. I am used to slamming doors and stomping, but so far I have not heard my favorite from him, the famous, "I hate you!" I honestly can't wait, because then I know I am doing my job.

Here's a hint: The more dramatic the reaction from your child to your no, the more you have just stopped them from doing something they were not supposed to be doing. Mr. Goudie was right, it was all so unnecessary.

Debra Seitz

Elburn