Best bets: Rob Schneider, 'Aladdin' dance, Scottist fest

Rob Schneider's resume runs long on wacky movie comedies ranging from "The Animal" to the "Deuce Bigalow" films. Now Schneider is making a return to the stage with a standup comedy tour, including a stop this weekend at the Improv Comedy Showcase, 5 Woodfield Road, Schaumburg. $30. (847) 240-2001 or improv.com. 8 and 10:15 p.m. Friday, April 9; 7 and 9:15 p.m. April 10; 7 p.m. April 11

Three wishesThe Middle Eastern tale of "Aladdin" dances to life this weekend when Schaumburg Dance Ensemble performs a newly choreographed adaptation at the Prairie Center for the Arts, 201 Schaumburg Court, Schaumburg. $22; $12 students/seniors. (847) 895-3600 or prairiecenter.org. Noon and 4 p.m. Saturday, April 10; 1 and 5 p.m. Sunday, April 11Taking rootFourteen monumental steel sculptures resembling roots by Steve Tobin take root in the new outdoor installation "Steelroots: Tobin at the Morton Arboretum" at 4100 Route 53, Lisle. The exhibit - which opens today - is included with the admission price of $11; $10 for seniors; $8 for kids. (630) 968-0074 or mortonarb.org. 7 a.m. to sunset daily through Monday, Jan. 31, 2011Pet meritsThe Pet Party Palooza this Saturday may be mostly for merit badge-seeking Girl Scouts, but the general public can still go and see hamster races, a dog show, demonstrations from the K-9 unit of the Arlington Heights Police Department and more. It's at the Buddy Foundation, 65 W. Seegers Road, Arlington Heights. Free to watch, but $5 for Girl Scouts to work on merit badges and $5 to enter competing dogs. (847) 259-1182 or thebuddyfoundation.sc102.info. Noon to 2:30 p.m. Saturday, April 10China cavalcadeClassical Chinese legends are showcased in the international music and dance stage spectacular "Shen Yun," which plays locally this weekend at the Civic Opera House, 20 N. Wacker Drive, Chicago. $39-$150. (800) 982-2787 or Chicago-shows.com. 2 p.m. Saturday, April 10; 2 and 7 p.m. Sunday, April 11Time for tartansAnyone with Scottish or Celtic ancestry can get in touch with their heritage at the Heartland International Tattoo Music and Dance Festival. Don your family tartan and celebrate all things Scottish this Saturday at the Sears Centre Arena, 5333 Prairie Stone Parkway, Hoffman Estates. $39.50-$169. (800) 745-3000 or searscentre.com. 7 p.m. Saturday, April 10Disco dudesRelive the glory disco days of the British band the Bee Gees this Saturday when the touring tribute band revue "Stayin' Alive - One Nite of the Bee Gees" plays the Paramount Theatre, 8 E. Galena Blvd., Aurora. $25.50-$35.50. (630) 896-6666 or paramountaurora.com. 8 p.m. Saturday, April 10Jazz greatsBack in 1972, Jazz pianist and composer Chick Corea joined with vibraphonist Gary Burton for the influential jazz album "Crystal Silence." Now see them together again on Saturday when they play North Central College's Wentz Concert Hall, 171 E. Chicago Ave., Naperville. 8 p.m. Saturday, April 10Lovers 'Lake'American Ballet Theatre celebrates its 70th anniversary by offering a bounty for ballet lovers. An "All-American" program on Wednesday features Jerome Robbins' "Fancy Free," Twyla Tharp's "The Brahms-Haydn Variations" and Paul Taylor's "Company B," then "Swan Lake" floods the stage for a run of seven performances at the Civic Opera House, 20 N. Wacker Drive, Chicago. $20-$125. (800) 982-2787 or abt.org. "All-American" 7:30 p.m. Wednesday, April 14; "Swan Lake" at 7:30 p.m. Thursday, April 15; 2 and 7:30 p.m. Friday and Saturday, April 16 and 17; 1 and 5:30 p.m. Sunday, April 18Homespun artQuilters will be in heaven at the International Quilt Festival starting Thursday, since it features more than 60 classes, three luncheon-lectures, demonstrations galore and more at Donald E. Stephens Convention Center, 5555 N. River Road, Rosemont. Daily admission: $10; $8 seniors; $25 full show pass. (713) 781-6864 or quilts.com. 5 to 9 p.m. Thursday, April 15; 10 a.m. to 7 p.m. Friday and Saturday, April 16 and 17; 10 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, April 18False20001339Jazz pianist and composer Chick Corea teams up with vibraphonist Gary Burton for a concert at North Central College's Wentz Concert Hall in Naperville. False