Harry Potter and the teenage drivers
Let's just acknowledge right off the bat that Harry, Ron, Hermione and their wand-wielding friends are no sticklers for rules.
When last we saw them, the magical trio and their friends had launched a full-out war against ultimate rule-maker Dolores Umbridge and the wizardry government known as the Ministry of Magic in the 2007 film "Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix."
Before that, there were the little matters of an unauthorized trip to their boarding school in a "borrowed" flying Ford; the forbidden visit to the village of Hogsmeade via a secret tunnel; the sneaky trespassing in Professor Snape's office; and the invisibility cloak that allowed Harry to secretly prowl the school long after curfew.
Ah, yes. Curfew.
The one that says (in local muggle, that is, mortal communities) that teens 16 and under have to be in by 11 p.m. on weeknights.
In case you don't have a broomstick, another curfew prohibits drivers under 18 from being on the road after 10 p.m. weekdays.
Students of literature already have spotted the conflict in this story: Teens expected to be safe at home late at night v. teens expecting to flock to local multiplexes by the thousands for tonight's midnight debut of the wildly popular Harry Potter's latest adventure, "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince." Three hours later, in that darkest hour before dawn, the spellbound moviegoers will all head for home.
Local police apparently don't intend to play the evil Voldemort, assuming unless proved wrong that most cars will contain a parent or a parent-approved stand-in.
"We've never had a problem with late-night movies before, and I don't think we will now," said Mount Prospect officer Greg Sill.
Still, lest they be compared to the ineffective former Minister of Magic Cornelius Fudge, who saw no point in looking for trouble, police will be on patrol outside the AMC Randhurst 16 theater in Mount Prospect. And, no doubt, outside other major theaters, each of which will be showing Harry and friends simultaneously on multiple screens.
Wise parents will emulate the overbearing but lovable Mrs. Weasley, the protective mother who knows her children's whereabouts and the company they're keeping and, yes, has been known to wait up and worry until they're back in the fold.
As for youngsters too young to instantly apparate from place to place, you'll have to use the roads tonight. But take the direct route from here to there and use care not to do anything that attracts undue attention. You never know who's watching.
In the words of wicked little Draco Malfoy upon his first meeting with our hero Harry, "I'd be careful if I were you."