Community says goodbye, asks 'why?' at Engelhardt funeral

Al's love of cooking and the Chicago Cubs. Laura's fun personality and bright future.

The lives of the beloved father-daughter duo were celebrated and mourned Thursday inside a chapel overflowing with friends and family at St. Peter Lutheran Church in Schaumburg.

Hundreds of mourners came to say goodbye to Alan "Al" Engelhardt, 57, and his daughter, Laura, 18, and to seek an answer to the question, "Why?"

The answer to that question, said the Rev. William Cate, is, "I don't know."

Humans are not equipped to deal with this kind of loss, he said, and certainly not the shockingly violent way the Engelhardts died. Both were fatally stabbed in their Hoffman Estates home April 17. D'Andre Howard, boyfriend of Laura's sister Amanda, is charged.

As organ music resonated through the chapel, mourners read Bible passages, sang songs of hope, and talked about their love for Laura and Al. During the hourlong service, in which the two caskets sat next to each other, many quietly wiped away tears or wrapped an arm around the shoulder of the person next to them. Dozens of people wore purple ribbons to call attention to domestic violence.

Cate spoke of how much Al loved having the kids' friends over at the house, and how Laura was just weeks away from graduating from Conant High School with honors and pursuing a veterinary career.

Survivors of the tight-knit family were seated in the front row, including Al's wife and Laura's mother, Shelly Engelhardt, who was released from the hospital a few days ago after nearly dying herself from stab wounds. Also there were son Jeff, sister Amanda, and granddaughter Stelliah.

None of the family spoke during the service, but Jeff and Amanda Engelhardt wrote a heart-wrenching letter "To Dad and Laura" that appeared in the program.

"Though neither of you will read this, I hope the people who do will get a glimpse of how great you both were," they wrote. "While these words serve as a piece of my memory, I hope my actions and the way I live reflect your memory for the rest of my life."

While Cate couldn't answer the question "Why?" he answered the second most-asked question he's heard since April 17, "Where was God?"

"That, I know," Cate told the hundreds of mourners, as large photos of Al and Laura were projected on screens next to the altar.

"He was there when Al and Laura were fighting for their lives. He was in that room. He was there when Shelly was in the hospital fighting for her life," Cate said. "God is here ... Jesus is here. Jesus is here now, in the midst of all your grief and sorrow."

Cate concluded by telling the family: "Hold fast to each other. Hold fast to hope. Hold fast to Jesus."

Laura and Al, who some described as "best friends" and "inseparable," were buried next to each other after the service in the St. Peter cemetery.

The funeral of Marlene Gacek, 73, Al's mother-in-law and Laura's grandmother, who was also killed in the melee, will be held at 10 a.m. Friday at St. Hubert Catholic Church in Hoffman Estates.

Editor's note: As a matter of philosophy, the Daily Herald does not photograph funerals without permission of the family except in extenuating circumstances such as the death of a public official. In this case, we asked the Engelhardt family for approval and when it was granted, were as inconspicuous as possible in photographing the services.

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