T.O. to Bears? Sure, that'll work

Terrell Owens to the Bears.

There. I said it. Can't take it back.

And why not?

Can you think of a single reason not to sign T.O., who was cut loose by the Cowboys Thursday?

OK, I'll grant you that he carries a hint of baggage, and is perhaps the greatest source of sideline poison this side of ricin.

So to combat that, all you need is a strong head-coaching personality who rules with an iron fist - someone who frightens players - in order to keep Owens under control.

And, a general of a GM who puts players in their place and keeps them from repeating their mistakes.

And, an ownership that is quite public in its view that the franchise does things a certain way, will bring in only a certain kind of player, and won't tolerate such shenanigans.

And, very strong locker-room leaders who both verbally and physically insist others do as they're supposed to do.

And, a veteran QB with a proven track record who dominates the landscape and won't take any garbage from anyone.

All of those would be helpful considering Owens managed to ruin a solid relationship with Jeff Garcia in San Francisco.

And then after wanting out and personally picking Philadelphia and QB Donovan McNabb, he found a way to destroy a perfect situation there and turn an entire city against him.

And then after choosing Dallas, he absolutely wrecked a clubhouse and turned an entire organization against him, including QB Tony Romo and an owner who had stood up for him against all comers.

While there is no denying his talent, which you could argue is on a level with the very best who have ever played that position, the guy needs professional help.

He needs a full-time psychiatrist - who among us doesn't? - full-time supervision and a communications specialist.

Throw in all the other needs, like that strong-willed coach, GM, ownership, locker room, teammate and quarterback, and there's hardly a reason the Bears couldn't make it work with Terrell Owens, who is, after all, the No. 1 receiver the team so desperately needs.

Sounds far-fetched, huh?

Just repeat after me: Terrell is our wideout, Terrell is our wideout, Terrell is our wideout, Terrell is our ...

Back to reality

Seven-time Rams Pro Bowler Torry Holt will either be traded or released by March 17. Holt will be 33 in June and he's not what he used to be, with his production dropping way off on a terrible team in 2008.

But he'd still be better than anything the Bears have at the moment.

Ivan Boldirev-ing

Fans and media are really giving it to the Blackhawks for failing to make a major move at the trade deadline, but given the circumstances, and having backed themselves into a salary-cap corner, there wasn't much more GM Dale Tallon could do.

Setting aside the contract mistakes of the last couple of years, Tallon did well to get a defensive center, and he knew there wasn't room left to re-sign James Wisniewski anyway.

Give Tallon credit for not mortgaging the future. When there are several teams in your conference prepped to win it all and you haven't won a playoff series in 13 years, you don't bet the rent on a longshot.

It's already been a successful season, especially when you consider that the two guys they desperately wanted to dump on anyone last summer - Nikolai Khabibulin and Martin Havlat - have been a huge part of their fourth-place standing in the West.

The trade

With an inexperienced team that's never been through the wars, adding center Sami Pahlsson is significant, assuming Pahlsson rebounds from mono sometime soon.

He was part of the Ducks' Cup-winning shutdown line two years ago, and while not sexy, not the size they still need in the middle, and nothing like Olli Jokinen, Pahlsson should help.

What scares you is Ducks GM Bob Murray is the architect behind the Anaheim championship, and he's fleeced Tallon in the past, so you wonder what he knows about Pahlsson that the Hawks don't.

Cap crowd

Managing salaries is only going to get tougher as the cap shrinks, and the Hawks have some huge deals waiting to be penned for Jonathan Toews, Patrick Kane and Duncan Keith - who would be nuts not to ask for Brian Campbell money considering he's the better player.

Let's hope in the summers to come, unlike 2008, the Hawks have a plan in place.

Just dreaming

All that said, Chris Neil sure would have been a comforting presence in the Hawks' lineup.

The punch line

Kerry Wood reported no problems with his aching back Wednesday after pitching batting practice for the first time this spring.

Best headline

Sportspickle.com: "Barry Bonds getting free agent interest as defensive lineman.''

Warming up

Can it be, only 56 days to the first Party in the Park?

Freezing up

David Letterman: "It's been so cold, Alex Rodriguez's cousin injected him with Tabasco sauce.''

And finally

Miami Herald's Greg Cote, on the NBA's financial troubles: "I didn't realize things were so bad. But that was before I saw those two Heat players at that intersection on Biscayne Boulevard holding 'Will Dribble for Food' signs."

brozner@dailyherald.com