Reflecting on what matters most

This year, my friend Lynda Reilly's birthday falls on Thanksgiving.

Considering leap years and that Thanksgiving is the fourth Thursday of November, my birthday has fallen nine times on the day when we come together to count our blessings. In 2011, I'll celebrate my 10th Thanksgiving birthday.

What's more, last year my son, Jeff, left for Seoul, South Korea, on my birthday to fulfill a one-year contract teaching English. When he called this year on my birthday, the 15-hour time difference made it a day early CST.

I got all choked up when I heard his voice. And when he said that the won was at an all-time low exchange rate as he prepares his departure, I had little advice.

Yet mindful of Thanksgiving, I paused to reflect about things I appreciate most. Those "things" happen to be my experiences with people I've loved, recognized, protected and respected over the years.

In a related conversation about lifelong learning and the current political and economic scene, son Tep reminded me of Lockean Empiricism.

The 17th-century political philosopher John Locke espoused that the human mind is a "tabula rasa" or a blank slate until sensory experience begins to write on it. Locke's philosophical theory supported that perception and knowledge make you what you are.

Locke also argued that government depends on the consent of the governed.

I was grateful to be reminded, with more reason to appreciate my nurturing parents - independent, conservative folks with a strong work ethic and dedication to faith, family and reading - who gave me flight under their wings. I've learned parenting is hard!

My dad, one of 12 children, grew up Catholic, the son of a building contractor in Akron, Ohio. My mother, one of nine and Methodist, lived on a farm in Battle Ground, Ind. They met at Purdue where my dad was on the G.I. Bill after his service in the Navy during World War II. Their experiences during the Depression were strikingly different.

As a child in Muncie, Ind., I didn't understand my dad's passion, through good times and bad, to work long hours and some weekends to build his general construction and roofing business. Now I do.

To this day, my dad likes to tap his schnoz and call himself a "hard-nosed" so and so.

Way too often, when my wants as a teenager exceeded my needs, I'd beg, "All the kids are doing it!"

Bluntly, he'd say, "All the kids aren't doing it. You aren't."

My parents' best advice was, "If you get into trouble, don't ever be afraid to call home."

Though at times I fought it, I always knew their tough love was unconditional and fair.

My dad's independent family business - where employees were paid on merit and with respect for their God-given talents - also provided an experience that's sometimes hard to follow (or swallow!) in today's world where greed and glitz seem to take center stage.

One of my favorite jobs as a kid was helping my dad deliver boxes of oranges and apples to his customers every Christmas Eve. Even then, the way he showed appreciation seemed more appropriate than the quarts of Jack Daniels from vendors that ended up under our Christmas tree.

More thanks

My cousin Candyce Krumwiede and her husband, Dave, opened their home to us in January 1993 while we looked for houses in Naperville, welcoming our move from Chatham, N.J., back to the Midwest.

A couple months later, my then-new neighbor Debbie Shaughnnessy handed me a "help wanted ad" for a PR position. That introduction led to an 18-month stint at Naper Settlement where I became immersed in our city's rich history, which shaped my appreciation for this community's can-do spirit.

I met Ray Kinney my first day on the job. I've always said I met some of Naperville's most interesting people, past and present, during my experiences there.

After I left Naper Settlement, Jack Romaine, then-president of the Naperville Area Chamber of Commerce, put me "on call" to answer phones when the chamber first moved its offices above Lou Malnati's. That's where I met then-chamber staffers Emy Trotz, Sandy Forty, Jan Erickson, Jennie Gates and Kim Weeks, as well as a diverse set of business leaders who work to make our community a remarkable place to call home.

I also remember a "neighbors night out" when four couples enjoyed the hospitality of Meson Sabika shortly after we moved here.

That evening led to getting to know Hossien Jamali, the restaurant's gracious owner.

Thursday Meson Sabika again will open the doors to its historic mansion to serve Thanksgiving dinner to folks in need. Last year, they served more than 1,200 dinners, compliments of the house. This year they've booked reservations to capacity for 1,500.

Thank you for counting your blessings and your birthdays!

Stephanie Penick writes about Naperville. Contact her at spennydh@aol.com.