Leave it to the Bears to come up with this
To the uninitiated, the Bears' offense has looked like a Phelps out of water.
To the initiated, the Bears once again are leading the way in offensive innovation.
Remember, this is the franchise that introduced the No-quarterback Huddle, the West Toast Offense and the Run-and-Can't-Shoot-Straight Passing Game.
Now they're up to something new again - a strategy of the quarterback can't help the supporting cast and the supporting cast can't help the offense.
The Bears still are sloshing around with quarterbacks Rex Grossman and Kyle Orton. Grossman's stock has fallen so far that it appears he is losing the quarterback derby to Orton, whose stock hasn't exactly risen.
With two backups competing to be the starter, all that's left for fans to clamor for is a rookie third-stringer whose name they haven't memorized yet.
Now, it is common in the NFL for a team to have a quarterback so good he can elevate inferior teammates, or teammates so good they can elevate an inferior quarterback.
The Bears instead have chosen to surround inferior quarterbacks with an inferior supporting cast. It's like having a bad script and worse cast.
Neither Grossman nor Orton is Brett Favre. Good for them, considering when he was available Bears management indicated it didn't need him.
For many of his 16 seasons in Green Bay, Favre turned nondescript running backs and wide receivers into winners. At 38 years of age, he just might turn the Jets into winners this season.
The rare quarterback is good enough to do that. Early in his career John Elway directed mundane Denver offenses to the Super Bowl.
Could Orton or Grossman do that for the Bears this season? Can Ortman or Grossman?
Not likely, unless a mime can carry a tune.
Most teams would conclude that the only alternative is for the supporting cast to carry these particular quarterbacks.
You know, they would get a great offensive line to protect the passer, wide receivers to catch his wobbles, and a running game to keep the defense honest.
That's how bad quarterbacks become good, good quarterbacks become great and great quarterbacks become Hall of Famers.
Or more to the point, those elements and a remarkable defense were how Jim McMahon became a champion.
This would be the obvious way to proceed. These Bears aren't into the obvious. They're too smart for that.
Instead, the Bears are left with an offensive line that doesn't figure to block out its deficiencies, a running game that's a work in progress and wide receivers too young, old or subpar.
Even if the Bears' quarterbacks were good enough to simply manage the offense, it would be like asking someone to manage a food store with empty shelves.
The supporting cast was so inferior Saturday at Seattle that Grossman almost became a sympathetic figure.
Meanwhile, neither Grossman nor Orton is good enough to make the offensive line, running backs and wide receivers better.
Brilliant, don't you think?
A Bears franchise that once thrilled the nation with its T-formation is trying to do so again, this time by not crossing the t's or dotting the i's.
Few NFL teams would dare deploy this strategy, but offensive innovation rages through the Bears' DNA.