A little humanity in an increasingly heartless world

If Jim Caudill weren't my friend. If I hadn't talked at length to the sister of a murder victim -- or to a friend of a man critically injured on his motorcycle.

Perhaps, then, I'd just be a somewhat listless observer of what seems to be a growing number of thoughtless people in an increasingly heartless world.

Caudill, principal of Naperville Central High School, appears headed for reassignment next year after he admitted plagiarizing a speech he gave to seniors last week. He escaped with a job amid calls for his firing and worse by some Web commenters, a columnist and a tabloid newspaper.

Sue Gibbons called me to ask if we could run some nice portraits of her sister, nephew and brother-in-law -- the victims of an apparent murder-suicide Wednesday in Roselle. She suggested that upon seeing the face of the adorable 7-year-old Joe Fontana, perhaps the Web commenters would tone down their insensitive remarks.

Same for Haley, who did not wish to comment for publication. She's a friend of a Naperville motorcyclist sideswiped by a 16-year-old driver on I-88 near Sugar Grove. Haley got in the middle of an online debate -- before anyone had a clue of who was to blame for the accident -- about whether motorcyclists inherently cause crashes. She suggested the Web posters tone down their rhetoric out of respect to the family of the accident victim. Many of the posters ignored her.

"Haley," one retorted, "take your jackboot stuff elsewhere. This is a public forum."

Yes, the world has become a public forum. And the debate -- much of it abetted by the anonymity of the Internet -- is far from civil.

(I can almost hear some of you thinking: Well, if the Web comments are so obnoxious, why not just shut 'em down? Frankly, this is pretty new to us and we're in the process of looking for ways to better police the comments.)

Caudill was called a "doofus," "putz" "dummy" and "stupid" among other insults on our Web site. Yes, there was some thoughtful debate, but the name-calling, the insults and the silly banter seemed to permeate. And, yes, I was especially offended because this was my friend -- a man who has spent 34 years at Naperville Central, put in countless extra hours as principal, has a wife struggling with a serious illness and at least a couple kids in college.

But aren't we, as a community newspaper, another editor here noted, supposed to treat the people we cover in our community as we might treat a friend -- with respect and compassion?

That's all Sue Gibbons was looking for. In the face of unspeakable tragedy, she wanted to be sure her slain sister, 7-year-old nephew and even the brother-in-law who likely shot them to death were more than the images of the home surrounded by police tape.

She also wanted everyone to know that despite the horror of what had happened, hers was "a family that loved each other desperately," how young Joe was an avid (and accomplished) bowler, a smart kid, interested in karate and one who suffered through piano lessons. Her sister Becky was warm and generous. Even the suspected killer, Mike, had lived a good and positive life up until the point he snapped.

In our discussions on Thursday, I was struck by Gibbons' courage and compassion. I think we all could learn something from how she's dealt with this horrific situation. She wasn't looking for publicity, but she agreed to talk about her family, and I wrote up the story that appears on today's front page. It appeared on our Web site Thursday afternoon, and I was somewhat heartened to see the first few story comments that began to appear minutes later.

The first read: "Thoughts and prayers to the family."

The second: "Cute little guy."

A little humanity.

Sometimes that's all we can ask for.