Simpsons to slasher can stuff those stockings
Christmas is a week away, and the movie studios are releasing a slew of stocking-stuffers today. Let's get to it:
"The Simpsons Movie" -- Like many "Simpsons" fans, I was dreading this movie. The TV show, while still better than 90 percent of everything else on television, hit its creative peak about 10 years ago. A movie would just underscore how far the show has fallen since those brilliant mid- to late-'90s episodes, right? Wrong. "The Simpsons Movie" is a hilarious throwback to that golden period. It doesn't break any new ground, sticking instead to the narrative formula the show has perfected during its 18-year run. The main plot revolves around what happens after Homer dumps a silo filled with his pet pig's poop into the river. The EPA, led by the deranged Russ Cargill (a funny Albert Brooks), responds by placing a huge glass dome over Springfield, sealing it off from the rest of the world. Homer, of course, tries to make things right. The gags run fast and furious throughout the movie's 86 minutes, and most are successful. (I particularly like the moments that earned the movie its PG-13 rating, like Homer flipping off a mob of angry Springfieldians.) The movie also looks fantastic, with detailed backgrounds and crowd scenes that utilize every inch of the widescreen frame. The DVD comes with two commentaries, deleted scenes and trailers. A substantive making-of documentary would have made this a nearly perfect DVD package, but it's still pretty nice. (PG-13; Fox, $29.98)
"Stardust" -- "Stardust" is an entertaining example of cinematic multiple-personality disorder. Its tone changes from one scene to the next, going from the grandeur of "The Lord of the Rings" to the light touch of "The Princess Bride," to name just a couple of its influences. This prevents "Stardust" from becoming something uniquely great, but it's a sweet and funny fairy tale with many good moments and a great performance by Michelle Pfeiffer. (I'm still not sure what to make of Robert De Niro, who nearly derails the movie as Captain Shakespeare, a macho sky pirate with a fondness for cross-dressing.) The film, directed by the talented Matthew Vaughn ("Layer Cake"), follows everyman hero Tristan as he travels to the magic land of Stormhold to retrieve a fallen star for the woman he loves. Also pursuing the star are a Macbethian witch (Pfeiffer), who believes the star will grant her eternal youth, and the sons of Stormhold's dead monarch, who believe the star holds the key to becoming king. The DVD includes a nice making-of featurette and deleted scenes. (PG-13; Paramount, $29.99)
"Once" -- Looking for something different to watch this season, something that will evoke the holiday spirit? Try this low-budget gem, a sweet neo-musical about a struggling Dublin rock musician and his sort-of romance with a single mother. The leads are played by real-life musicians Glen Hansard (leader of the Irish band The Frames) and Marketa Irglova, and they have a rich chemistry on screen. Writer-director John Carey punctuates his simple story with wonderful musical performances. "Once" is smart, funny and touching -- and the music rocks. The DVD includes commentaries and a making-of featurette. (R; Fox, $29.99)
"Blade Runner: The Final Cut" (two-disc special edition) -- "Blade Runner," the influential sci-fi classic about a cop whose job it is to kill artificial humans, or "replicants," is one of the most tinkered-with films in history. As many as four different cuts of the film have been seen over the years. This new two-disc edition features director Ridley Scott's final cut of the movie and a feature-length documentary that explores its conception, creation and legacy. The picture quality is absolutely stunning; this does not look like a movie that came out in 1982! And the movie is as exciting and inventive as it was 25 years ago. The two-disc set will satisfy most casual fans of the movie. Hardcore "Blade Runner" nuts can also choose a four-disc set ($34.99) that includes all earlier cuts of the film or a deluxe five-disc set ($78.92) that includes the little-seen work print. (R; Warner Home Video, $20.97)
"Halloween" (two-disc unrated director's cut) -- Rob Zombie is a talented filmmaker, and I expect that one day he'll produce a genre masterpiece. His "reimagining" of John Carpenter's classic slasher flick "Halloween" isn't it. Zombie tries to justify this remake by delving deeper into psycho-killer Michael Myers' story. He takes us back to Michael's hellish white-trash childhood, when he lived with his two sisters, his stripper mom and her drunken boyfriend. These early scenes feel forced, and they don't add much to the Myers legend. Zombie does better with the creepy middle act, which takes place in the sanitarium Michael is sentenced to after killing his sister. When Michael escapes and returns to his hometown, the movie becomes as drearily familiar as the countless existing "Halloween" sequels. The two-disc DVD set comes packed with solid extras, including a Zombie commentary and a slew of making-of featurettes, so fans of Zombie's version should have much to enjoy on this release. (Genius Products, $29.95)