Grammar Moses: What did you just call me?

On a recent trip to Ireland, while driving through Galway, I spied a sign for Galwegian R.F.C., one of the big rugby teams in the country.

I nearly drove on the right side of the road after having seen that.

If people from Glasgow, Scotland, are Glaswegians, how is it that people from Galway are Galwegians? Different suffix, different country.

Peggy Schwebke wrote to ask how it's decided what to call people from a certain place. It's comforting to know I am not the only person wondering.

"I'm currently reading 'Riding the Elephant,' Craig Ferguson's second memoir, and his frequent use of the word 'Glaswegian' made me wonder how it's decided what to call people from a given location," she wrote. "People from Norway are called Norwegians and people from Glasgow are Glaswegians. So, I wondered if there's a general convention that places ending in consonant-vowel-consonant always end in '-egian.' But then people from Moscow are called Muscovites, which is altogether different and changes the first vowel, in addition to adding the suffix. Furthermore, 'Glasgow' and 'Moscow' both end with '-ow,' so why don't the words describing their inhabitants have a similar form? Are there some basic rules or do the local people just start using a term and it eventually becomes the accepted form?"

Perhaps, it's that I was on vacation, or that this was my second day of driving a car while sitting in what in 98% of the world would have been the passenger seat, on the left side of the narrow road, hedgerows tickling the car, entering a daisy chain of roundabouts going clockwise, but I didn't give this nearly as much thought as Peggy did.

Until now.

Everyone knows people from Nigeria are called Nigerians.

But what do we know of Niger? As far as I can tell, no princes from Niger have ever reached out to me for help in securing their family fortune and sharing it with me.

I wonder how many people actually know how to pronounce Niger. (It's ni-ZHAIR, if you didn't know.)

The primary language in Niger is French, so it's not surprising that someone from Niger is called a Nigerien (yes, with an "e"). Think "Canadien," the French spelling of "Canadian."

If you're a hockey fan, you know what I'm talking about.

While we're in the neighborhood, what would you call someone from Chad?

That's right, a Chadian. To call them Chads would have people confusing them with fraternity brothers.

Muscovites don't refer to themselves as such, because they're primarily speaking Russian. The transliteration of what they call Moscow is MOOS-kva. They call themselves MOOS-kvich,

Let's take a look at the Middle East. You have Israelis, Qataris, Azerbaijanis, Kuwaitis, Omanis, Yemenis, Bahrainis and Iraqis. You also have Syrians, Iranians, Palestinians, Jordanians, Tunisians and Saudi Arabians, Egyptians, Libyans, Armenians and Moroccans. Resisting the first two dominant constructions are the Turks and Afghans, the Lebanese and, of course, the Cypriots.

Sure, there are commonalities. In the Americas, we have a lot of -ans (Americans, Bolivians, Brazilians, Mexicans) but "Peruans" or "Peruites" certainly doesn't roll off the tongue, so that is why they're Peruvians.

We have Alaskans, Delawareans (not pronounced like Deloreans), Kansans (because Kansasans sounds really dumb), Chicagoans and Chattanoogans.

A lot of what people call themselves is pleasing to the ear.

But what about smaller locales: Mount Prospectors? (that is the long-standing name of the Prospect High School newspaper), Arlington Heightsians? Des Plainesers?

I've covered news in these towns for four decades and I don't recall ever hearing a name for residents of these towns.

Following the pattern here, you'd probably call me a Carpentersvillain. I'm not sure I like that.

I know, however, that people in the next town over are proud to be called Elginites.

Peggy lives in Schaumburg, which was named for the settlers who came primarily from Grafschaft Schaumburg in Germany.

So it follows that someone hailing from Schaumburg would be called a Schaumburger.

Which reminds me: it's dinnertime.

Write carefully!

• Jim Baumann is vice president/executive editor of the Daily Herald. You can buy Jim's book, "Grammar Moses: A humorous guide to grammar and usage," at

grammarmosesthebook.com. Write him at jbaumann@dailyherald.com

and put "Grammar Moses" in the subject line. You also can friend or follow Jim at facebook.com/baumannjim.