It's no secret: Grammar Moses is in the holiday spirit

Many years ago, I wrote a story in which I buried a secret message. No, it did not profess my undying love for Mary Ann from “Gilligan's Island” or divulge my voting record. I doubt anyone ever noticed, but it amused me.

Every so often I think about trying that again.

• Reader Ken Juranek writes: “Your Oct. 28 column about the ‘young men who were driving irradically' reminded me of a story my sister-in-law told me. A woman at her workplace described how another woman walked. ‘She was walking this way ... and then that way. She was walking erotically.'”

Really, Ken, you make me blush. I know it is entirely possibly for a woman to walk erotically and erratically. In 6-inch heels, she can do both at the same time.

Yes, that sentence really came from my fingertips.

• Cynthia Cwynar wrote to me some months ago, clearly in reference to something we'd discussed earlier. While I don't have the original email, the follow-up makes for interesting discussion. She wanted to know whether “to” was necessary in “I'm helping him to learn his grammar.”

Here in the United States, the bare form of the infinitive (without the ‘to') is standard. In England, the “to” form of the infinitive is standard. However, I don't think anyone will slap you in leg irons if you use the nonstandard form.

• Reader Tom Connelly sent me a competitor's headline with a recommended fix: “‘After 60 years, survivors mourn 95 lost in school fire with hymn' should be ‘After 60 years, survivors mourn with hymn 95 lost in school fire,'” he wrote.

In my limited exposure to church, I seem to remember hymns posted on the wall by the number with which they're listed in hymnals so congregants can follow along with the service. If so, I might read Tom's suggested headline to mean that the 95th hymn was lost in the fire.

So I would, for simplicity's sake, simply leave the hymn out of the headline.

• Till, 'til or until?

My friend Bonnie Bulmash, who is our obituary coordinator, suggested I examine these often misunderstood words. She often encounters them in her work.

A till is a cash drawer. But “till” also is a synonym for “until,” which is a new one on me. Meanwhile, “'til” (with the apostrophe) is a much-scorned abbreviation for “until.” Using it, along with trying to abbreviate “until” with “till” preceded by an apostrophe are offenses punishable by receiving coal in one's stocking.

So, till next Sunday, I bid you good holiday tidings. And I hope you were able to decipher my message.

Write carefully!

• Jim Baumann is vice president/managing editor of the Daily Herald. Write him at jbaumann@dailyherald.com. Put Grammar Moses in the subject line. You also can friend or follow Jim at facebook.com/baumannjim.