Oldie but goody cast scores extra points in fun, but fumbled gridiron fantasy '80 for Brady'

“80 for Brady” - ★ ★ ½

The screenplay's lame, but the dames are game all the same.

Lily Tomlin is 83. Jane Fonda is 85. Rita Moreno is 91. Sally Field clocks in at a youthful 76.

To paraphrase Jessica Rabbit: “They still got it, Eddie!”

This quartet of well-seasoned Hollywood legends brings so much fun and camaraderie to the football comedy “80 for Brady” that you barely notice the pitifully cliched and unchallenging screenplay, telegraphed gags and semi-crisp direction by Kyle Marvin.

But you do.

“80 for Brady” qualifies as sheer wish-fulfillment, even though it tells us it has been “inspired” by a true story of four Massachusetts senior citizens who acted upon their obsession for New England Patriots Tom Brady by going to the 2017 Super Bowl to support their fave 39-year-old quarterback.

“He's practically 80 in human years!” chirps Lou (Tomlin).

Lou, in recovery from chemotherapy, leads this Brady bunch and enters a contest to win Super Bowl tickets for herself and her three buds.

Field provides the movie's comedic extra Field-goal as Betty, a socially gawky, numbers-crunching math professor who's tired of dealing with her ultra-needy hubby (Bob Balaban), given to forgetting stuff, like his pants.

Trish (Fonda) has two claims to fame. She writes popular fan-fiction and used to be the local Mayflower Girl beauty queen, which easily explains her now-ironed countenance and her line about what it cost “to look like this.”

Meanwhile, Maura (Moreno) is stuck in the Calm Gardens assisted living facility where a would-be suitor (Glynn Turman) wants to spend time with her.

Once Trish, Lou and Betty spring Maura from the Gardens and hit the road to Houston, “80 for Brady” finally hikes the dramatic ball and puts the plot into action.

Lou (Lily Tomlin) meets the quarterback of her dreams, Tom Brady, in the fact-inspired comedy "80 for Brady." Courtesy of Paramount

The pedestrian screenplay from Sarah Haskins and Emily Halpern traffics in arthritic comic devices that derive cheap laughs from the women losing their tickets, overindulging on hallucinogenic edibles, and Betty chowing down during a hot sauce-eating contest hosted by Guy Fieri.

And do we really need to see another cliched slow-motion “solitary march” of the main characters, even if it's shot by two-time Oscar-winning cinematographer John Toll?

Trish makes time with an available former Super Bowl champ named Dan (Harry Hamlin in super-charm mode), while Alex Moffat and Rob Corddry's local sportscasters Nat and Pat vainly attempt to match the razored comic exchanges between commentators Elizabeth Banks and John Michael Higgins from “Pitch Perfect.”

Tom Brady - also a producer here - acquits himself nicely as an actor playing Tom Brady, who apparently owes his historic Super Bowl win to Lou's impassioned pep talk piped through his helmet audio.

“80 for Brady” leans more heavily toward a female buddy comedy than an authentic football movie. You could take the same characters, plot, jokes and even dialogue, and aside from specific sports jargon, it wouldn't be much different.

Brady's four superfans seem to be more interested in touch than tackles in a blunted comedy that will surely win at least one impressive honor: being included on AARP's list of recommended movies for seniors.

Starring: Lily Tomlin, Jane Fonda, Rita Moreno, Sally Field, Tom Brady, Harry Hamlin, Bob Balaban, Glynn Turman

Directed by: Kyle Marvin

Other: A Paramount Pictures release in theaters. Rated PG-13 for drug references, suggestive language. 98 minutes

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