Tips for developing a schedule for your new family
New parents are all in need of one thing — sleep! While the first few months with a newborn are the toughest and are bound to result in sleep deprivation, it is possible to take steps to help your baby sleep through the night as soon as they're able.
The majority of babies will begin sleeping through the night around six months of age, with some managing to do so a few months earlier, but parents don't need to wait until then to put a bedtime routine in place. They can start incorporating daily routines and bedtime rituals into their child's life early on.
Dr. Andy Bernstein, a pediatrician with offices in Buffalo Grove and Arlington Heights and spokesperson for the American Academy of Pediatrics, said infants are ready to start responding to a daily routine consisting of the baby's natural rhythm and parents' daily needs at around 4 months old.
“This routine usually revolves around feeding upon waking in the morning or after a nap, having interactive play and activity such as tummy time, walking outside, singing, playing with toys for one to two hours, followed by naptime,” said Bernstein. “To help foster sleep independence, feeding shouldn't be used to help an infant fall asleep at naptime.”
Bernstein said most babies follow a three-hour cycle of waking up, eating, playing and then having a one to two hour nap before repeating the process all over again. The routine can certainly be adjusted slightly to match the needs of the family, but it should still mirror that natural three-hour cycle. Remember, when your baby starts showing sleepy cues, it's time for a nap.
Bernstein said parents should incorporate tummy time into every wakeful period, whether that's on mom or dad's chest, on their tummy on the carpet or receiving blanket or making tummy time interactive by prompting them to roll over to grab a toy. Talk to your pediatrician about how to introduce your baby to tummy time and which tummy time activities are age appropriate.
“Tummy time is one of the best activities for babies. It allows them to develop the necessary muscles to lift their heads and strengthen their arms, abs and legs to eventually sit, crawl, stand and walk,” said Dr. Mohammed Homsi, a neurologist with a special qualification in child neurology at Amita Health. “If your baby isn't a fan yet, get down on the floor with them to keep them interested. Place toys within their reach or place a mirror in front of them.”
Following the eat, play, sleep schedule makes it easier for babies to follow a schedule as they grow. When it comes to setting a sleep schedule, Homsi said the sooner the better because it sets a foundation to build on and helps parents learn what works for them and their baby.
By 2 months old, babies can start recognizing routines, making it the perfect time to start implementing a naptime and bedtime routine.
When it's time for bed, Bernstein recommends parents follow the American Academy of Pediatrics' Brush, Book, Bed program to help cue infants and children that it's time to sleep. Start the routine by helping children brush their teeth each night. The AAP says parents can use a soft washcloth to wipe babies gums after feeding. Then, select a book to read before bed. Start with just a page or two from a board book for newborns and increase the amount read and difficulty as they age. Then go to bed at the same time each night.
“Make bedtime between 7 and 8 p.m.,” said Homsi. “They need to be asleep no later than 8 p.m., because babies' cortisol will increase, and this will give them a boost of energy.”
While every family's routine will look slightly different, it should incorporate all of the above elements to some degree. Once you find a bedtime routine that works for your family, keep it as consistent as possible while understanding that day and night routines need some element of flexibility. While between 7 and 8 p.m. is an ideal bedtime, putting your baby to bed 6:30 or 6:45 p.m. is acceptable, too.
“Feedings, playtimes and naps don't need to be happening at exactly the same hour and minute every day. It's OK if the schedule is 10 to 15 minutes off, for example,” said Homsi. “What's more important is the consistency of the steps and to respond to their sleepy cues before they become overtired.”
Empowering babies to self-soothe and learn how to fall asleep on their own is part of developing a good sleep routine. Bernstein said some families start teaching their children to self-soothe at 2 months, with those babies eventually sleeping a straight 10 to 12 hours a night by the time they're six to eight months. Families that choose to support their infants for longer periods can still implement a regular bedtime routine.
“Teach infants how to self-sooth in little bits at a time. Let them cry for five minutes, then 10, then 15,” said Bernstein. “After a night or two, babies usually respond really well.”
For the first two months, Bernstein said parents are at the mercy of their newborns' natural rhythms, as babies aren't ready to respond to and learn from routines during those early months. By two months, however, their baby will begin recognizing routines and by four months, they'll be able to respond to their own and caregivers' natural rhythms.
During the day, follow a three-hour cycle of eat, play, sleep, repeat. When it's time to wind down for the day, help kids take care of necessary habits, curl up with a book or two, and then put them to bed. By following a consistent routine and teaching them to self-soothe, sleeping through the night will be considerably easier for both infants and their parents.