Movie review: Benedict Cumberbatch's 'The Grinch' no match for animated original

“The Grinch” - ★ ★ ½

You're not a mean one, Mr. Grinch.

At least not mean enough to be called “a monster” in a song.

Not near mean enough for lyricists to describe your heart as “an empty hole.”

Granted, your heart might be two sizes too small, but you have one, and in “The Grinch,” Illumination's eighth animated feature for Universal Pictures, it's still way too big for your conniving, gleefully cynical, obnoxiously selfish, killjoy character.

Let me put it another way, Mr. Grinch. You play too nice.

You obviously love your pet dog Max, even though you pretend not to. (You call him “the best dog” a guy could have. What's mean about that?)

You actually show signs of empathy.

Remember the scene where you discover that the comically overweight moose pulling your sleigh to Who-ville has a wife and baby moose, and you free him to go with his family instead of forcing him to finish pulling the sleigh?

You're not supposed to be nice. A Grinch must be mean! Mean! Mean! Mean!

You should be the nastiest Grinch that anyone's ever seen.

So when you get to the part where singing Whos change your heart, your stark transformation into a green Christian character should astonish us.

Because you have already lost most of your despicable Grinch-iness, we can only be mildly amused.

The good news, I suppose, would be that the great Boris Karloff's 1966 TV film short based on Dr. Seuss' classic poem “How the Grinch Stole Christmas,” still ranks as the No. 1 screen adaptation of the holiday classic.

It certainly works better than Ron Howard's lumbering 2000 live-action fantasy starring Jim Carrey. And it sure beats this new computer-animated feature codirected by Scott Mosier (his directorial feature debut) and Yarrow Cheney (who gave us the morally deficit “Secret Life of Pets”).

Part of the problem with “The Grinch” stems from its plushily padded plot designed to s-t-r-e-t-c-h 30 minutes of good material into 86 elongated minutes of cartoony chases, overwritten dialogue and a lack of genuine, touching moments. (This movie will never be mistaken for a Pixar production.)

Then, Mr. Grinch, we have the issue of Benedict Cumberbatch's disappointingly wishy-washy interpretation of your personality.

Cumberbatch is a great actor with a broad dramatic range, and I understand why he wanted to distance his Grinch from Karloff's iconic, sinister characterization.

But Cumberbatch simply makes you sound too normal, too ordinary. Too Grinchless.

Don't get me wrong. Kids will thrill to the constant action and cartoony elements of your movie.

Cameron Seely pumps plenty of cute into her Cindy Lou Who, who's only just 2.

Rashida Jones supplies the maternal pipes to her single mom, Donna Lou Who. (We never find out what happened to Cindy's missing dad ­- Who Knew Who?)

Keenan Thompson delivers a spunky performance as a local Christmas enthusiast, Bricklebaum.

They all add charm to this comedy called “Grinch.”

It's not all that great, but it'll do in a pinch.

<b>Starring:</b> Benedict Cumberbatch, Rashida Jones, Kenan Thompson, Angela Lansbury, Pharrell Williams

<b>Directed by:</b> Yarrow Cheney, Scott Mosier

<b>Other:</b> A Universal Pictures release. Rated PG. 86 minutes