Penalty for penalties

I'm waiting for Mr. McCaskey's call making me the next Bears coach. The first thing that I will do will be to institute a rule to cut back on penalties.

Once the season begins, any player that commits a foul causing the Bears a penalty will be fined $1,000 ... and the penalty will be doubled each time the player commits a foul after the first foul during that same game or $2,000, $4,000, $8,000 or $16,000, increasing after each foul.

This rule starts again at the next game. The player pays up after each game. There is no carry over to the next game. The players start all over again with a clean slate with each new game.

All money collected over the season is then divided among the players who play the equivalent of a minimum of one half of the season without a penalty. Any player that causes a penalty during the season is ineligible to collect from this fund.

This rule applies to all personnel of the Bears team ... rookies and veterans. We can call this the Playing Under Control Rule. Players who pay the penalty can be called another name - or just payers of Players Not In Control fee.

Mike Sidor

Rolling Meadows