Carmel High students hear talk on chastity

Sex, dating, pornography, abstinence, sexually transmitted diseases, love, lust, marriage and divorce. Not your typical high school subject matter.

Students at Carmel Catholic High School in Mundelein took a break from math, science and English, to hear impassioned arguments to stay chaste until marriage.

Jason Evert of the San Diego-based Pure Love Club, gave a 75-minute presentation to hundreds of students Thursday.

Using humor and stories from his own life, Evert challenged the students to stay pure.

He made a point of clarifying the difference between love and lust, which he said, teens often confuse.

"When you have sex, your bodies are saying to each other 'I'm completely yours forever,'" he said. "And you know in the depths of your heart this has nothing to do with love. The real test for love is to ask yourself 'Is he or she worth waiting for?' Your purity proves your love."

Taking a positive approach, Evert said condemning young people for being sexually active isn't helpful. Instead, he encouraged the kids to take a long view of life.

"You can write love letters to your future husbands and wives explaining that you are saving yourself for them," Evert said.

That resonated with some students.

Charlie Sanroman, a senior, said he liked that Evert approached the topic from a positive perspective.

"It was not condemning or harsh," Sanroman said. "The idea that you are saving yourself for a future spouse and that you are doing it from love is compelling."

Addressing the issues that lead to sex, Evert told the girls that dressing modestly can be far more attractive to guys than wearing skimpy outfits.

"By dressing modestly you are saying to guys, 'I'm worth waiting to see,'" he said. "It's saying you take yourself seriously and have self-respect. Modesty can be captivating."

Evert also questioned the notion of safe sex. He cited statistics that he said demonstrate kids can contract sexually transmitted diseases such as genital human papillomavirus, even if they use condoms.

"Forty-five percent of college women have GHP," he said. "And that can lead to cervical cancer." Evert said the only way to guarantee never to contract an STD is to stay abstinent. He encouraged any student who has been sexually active to get tested.

"Number one, is to find good friends who will support you in this," Evert said. "You should only date someone you can imagine yourself marrying."

Evert added confession, attendance at Mass and devotion to Mary as other ways Catholic students can stay the course.

Based on the applause level, Evert's message seemed to connect with the students. Some said they felt like he was able to speak on their level.

"I really liked that he used stories and examples from his own life," said senior Morgan Jenich. "I also thought the idea that we need to have self-respect was helpful."

Senior student Stephen Ark said he appreciated hearing about all the things that can go wrong from having premarital sex.

"You never hear that side of the story," Ark said. "It's always portrayed as something good that you don't want to miss out on. I think it's good to hear the other side."