Naughty and nice: A guide to holiday theater

This time of year, naughty and nice describe not just behavior, but the surfeit of seasonal shows playing throughout the suburbs and city. Area theaters offer everything from traditional revivals of classic tales to unorthodox and even R-rated interpretations of holiday fare.

To help you choose, we're highlighting our picks among suburban and city offerings. Nice, in this case, means suitable for all ages. As for naughty, well, plan on an adult night out — and make sure no one going with you will be offended by an unusual, irreverent or satirical view of the holidays.

Here's the list. Check it twice. And enjoy the show.

Naughty

• The Second City celebrates the season, suburban-style, with “Holiday in the Heights,” an adults-only revue skewering last-minute shopping, boozy office parties and burned cookies. Performances begin Friday, Nov. 25, at the Metropolis Performing Arts Centre, 111 W. Campbell St., Arlington Heights. (847) 577-2121 or metropolisarts.com.

• The inventive Silent Theatre Company puts its unique spin on Charles Dickens' tale with its original, grimly expressionist production “A Christmas Carol: the silent bah-humbug” meant to “scare as much as inspire.” Artistic director Tonika Todorova directs the show, which opens Friday, Nov. 25, at St. Paul's Church, 2215 W. North Ave., Chicago. (773) 544-1749 or silenttheatre.com.

• David Sedaris' holiday sendup “The Santaland Diaries,” inspired by Sedaris' stint as a Macy's elf, returns to Theater Wit, 1229 W. Belmont Ave, Chicago, beginning Friday, Nov. 25. Mitchell Fain reprises his celebrated performance as Sedaris' wryly perceptive alter-ego, Crumpet the Elf. (773) 975-8150 or theaterwit.org.

• What more could a “Star Trek” fan desire than a holiday classic done entirely in Klingon? Commedia Beauregard reprises “A Klingon Christmas Carol,” its version of Charles Dickens' tale performed in the language of the TV show's warriors. The story centers on the spirits' attempts to help Scrooge become honorable and courageous, but not necessarily nice. The show opens Friday, Nov. 25, at the Greenhouse Theater Center, 2257 N. Lincoln Ave., Chicago. (773) 404-7336 or greenhousetheater.org.

• A newly single guy's chance encounter with a modern Match Girl inspires “Striking Twelve,” a holiday hybrid by Rachel Sheinkin (“The 25th Annual Putnam County Spelling Bee”) and the band Groove Lily. Bohemian Theatre Ensemble remounts 2010's “un-holiday” hit beginning Thursday, Dec. 1, at the Heartland Studio, 7016 N. Glenwood Ave., Chicago. (866) 811-4111 or bohotheatre.com.

• Writer/lyricist David Cerda imagines Rudolph as a transvestite in Hell in a Handbag Productions' musical, “Rudolph, The Red-Hosed Reindeer,” which finds Santa attempting to restore his image by joining the Tea Party after he's caught in a sex scandal. Performances begin Thursday, Dec. 1, at Mary's Attic, 5400 W. Clark St., Chicago. (800) 838-3006 or handbagproductions.org.

• No zombie apocalypse is going to interfere with the Cooper family Christmas, not if Mr. Cooper has anything to say about it. That premise underscores New Millennium Theatre Company's “Silent Night of the Living Dead,” a seasonal homage to George Romero by company members Sean Harklerode and Chad Wise. Performances begin Friday, Dec. 2, at Theater Wit, 1229 W. Belmont Ave., Chicago. (773) 975-8150 or nmtchicago.org.

• One of Santa's reindeer accuses him of sexual harassment, leading the rest of them to reveal the scandal and corruption unfolding at the North Pole in “The Eight: Reindeer Monologues,” Stage Left Theatre's adults-only, late-night show beginning performances Friday, Dec. 9, at Theater Wit, 1229 W. Belmont Ave., Chicago. (773) 975-8150 or stagelefttheatre.com.

• British playwright Alan Ayckbourn skewers holiday traditions in “Season's Greetings,” a dark comedy about one family's ill-fated attempts at creating a happy holiday. Francis Guinan and Heidi Kettenring star in Northlight Theatre's production, directed by BJ Jones. The show runs through Sunday, Dec. 18, at the North Shore Center for the Performing Arts, 9501 Skokie Blvd., Skokie. (847) 673-6300 or northlight.org.

• The Neo-Futurists recall one of Chicago's great tragedies, the Iroquis Theatre fire of Dec. 30, 1903, in “Burning Bluebeard.” Created by Jay Torrence and directed by Halena Kays, the show — described as a “hauntingly beautiful homage to life” — finds clown survivors recounting the horrific event, which claimed the lives of 603 people, in a desperate attempt to craft an alternate ending. The show runs through Friday, Dec. 30, at 5153 N. Ashland Ave., Chicago. (773) 275-5255 or neofuturists.org.

• A frazzled mother with an alcoholic husband and an angsty daughter tries to make the holidays bright in The Annoyance Theatre's “Fa La La La (expletive).” The show runs Saturdays through Dec. 19, also Wednesdays, Dec. 14 and 21, and Friday, Dec. 23, at 4830 N. Broadway, Chicago. (773) 561-4665 or theannoyance.com.

• The House Theatre isn't afraid to address loss and grief that even seasonal spirit can't assuage in its annual production of “The Nutcracker,” which opens with the death of Clara's brother. Tommy Rapley directs and choreographs the show, which incorporates music, dance and puppetry. It runs through Friday, Dec. 30, at the Chopin Theatre, 1543 W. Division St., Chicago. (773) 251-2195 or thehousetheatre.com.

Nice

• The Metropolis Performing Arts Centre debuts a new adaptation of “A Christmas Carol” by resident playwright Scott Woldman, with music arrangements by Micky York. Performances begin Friday, Nov. 25, at 111 W. Campbell St., Arlington Heights. (847) 577-2121 or metropolisarts.com.

• A breakfast buffet with Santa accompanies select performances of Drury Lane Theatre's family-friendly production of “A Christmas Carol,” which opens Friday, Nov. 25, at 100 Drury Lane, Oakbrook Terrace. Brunch dates are Saturdays, Nov. 26, Dec, 3, 10 and 17. (630) 530-0111 or drurylaneoakbrook.com.

• Fox Valley Repertory reprises last year's production, “It's a Wonderful Life: A Live Radio Play,” adapted from Frank Capra's 1946 film. Director Rachel Rockwell and music director Tom Clear return, along with stars George Keating and Anna Hammonds. Performances begin Friday, Nov. 25, at Pheasant Run Resort, 4051 E. Main St., St. Charles. (630) 443-0438 or foxvalleyrep.org.

• Goodman Theatre's annual production of “A Christmas Carol” boasts new special effects, music and choreography and the return of Larry Yando in his fourth year as Ebenezer Scrooge. The show also features the return of artistic associate Steve Scott, who last directed the production 19 years ago and promises this incarnation will be “happier, scarier, funnier and more celebratory than ever.” The show opens Sunday, Nov. 27, at 170 N. Dearborn St., Chicago. (312) 443-3800 or goodmantheatre.org.

• Writer/performer Blake Montgomery plays Charles Dickens, who has spent the last 160 Decembers reading his famous tale to rapt fans, in The Building Stage's original show, “Charles Dickens Begrudgingly Performs ‘A Christmas Carol,' Again.” Performances begin Thursday, Dec. 1, at 412 N. Carpenter St., Chicago. (312) 491-1369 or buildingstage.com.

• “The Nativity,” Congo Square Theatre's jubilant, folk and gospel music-inspired retelling of Christ's birth, returns to the Goodman Theatre, 170 N. Dearborn St., Chicago, beginning Friday, Dec. 2. (312) 443-3800 or congosquaretheatre.org.

• National Pastime Theater celebrates “that other December holiday” with its world premiere show, “Hannukatz The Musical,” Terry Abrahamson's show based on his children's book “Hannukatz Saves Hannukah,” about aging hippie Hannukatz's visit to a group of Hannukah-averse kids on the eve of the holiday. Performances begin Friday, Dec. 2, at 4139 N. Broadway, Chicago. (773) 327-7077 or hannukatzsaveshanukkah.com.

• The Organic Theater Company looks at Marley's search for redemption “Jacob Marley's Christmas Carol,” writer Tom Mula's alternative take on the classic tale, in which a sprite named Bogle travels with Marley to hell and back. The show runs Thursday to Sunday, Dec. 8 to 11, at North Central College's Meiley-Swallow Hall, 31 S. Ellsworth, Naperville. (630) 637-7469 or organictheater.org.

• “A Christmas Story, The Musical!” the stage adaptation of Bob Clark's beloved 1983 film about young Ralphie's pursuit of a Red Ryder air rifle for Christmas, concludes its national tour at the Chicago Theatre, 175 N. State St., Chicago. The show runs Wednesday, Dec. 14, to Friday, Dec. 30. See thechicagotheatre.com or achristmasstorythemusical.com.

• Marriott Theatre spreads holiday cheer with Marc Robin's dynamic, heartfelt “White Christmas,” the stage adaptation of the 1954 film about a pair of Army buddies who romance a sister act while trying to save the Vermont inn owned by their former commanding officer. The show runs through Sunday, Jan. 1, at 10 Marriott Drive, Lincolnshire. (847) 634-0200 or marriotttheatre.com.

• “The Christmas Schooner,” the musical about the men who piloted the Great Lakes vessel known as the Christmas tree ship during the late 19th century, docks at Chicago's Mercury Theater, 3745 N. Southport, through Saturday, Dec. 31. Jeff Award winners L. Walter Stearns, Eugene Dizon and Brenda Didier helm the all-new production. (773) 325-1700 or mercurytheaterchicago.com.