Without common sense, 'Real Steel' left punchy

I'm guessing that "Real Steel" will be popular with the same demographic that turned out for "Transformers 3," another special effects action film in which shiny, metallic figures rip the lug nuts off each other while one-dimensional humans pretend to have more depth and emotions than their robotic counterparts.

I liked this tale much better in 1963 when it first appeared in "The Twilight Zone," written by Rod Serling and sci-fi giant Richard Matheson, who created the original short story "Steel" upon which this new movie is based.

That 25-minute TV episode had more insight into humanity and its relationship to violent sports than Shawn Levy's "Real Steel" touches in 126 long minutes.

Here is a science-fiction drama with more emphasis on fiction than either science or common sense.

"Real Steel" wants us to believe that an 11-year-old boy can, in just a few hours:

A) Excavate a huge G-2 sparring robot out of a mountainside dump overlooking a bottomless pit in an industrial junk yard

B) Load the half-ton robot on to a large dolly by himself

C) Whip the purloined robot right by the security system that he and his dad took pains to carefully avoid when they broke into the compound in the first place.

Dad refuses to help him.

He's Charlie Kenton (erstwhile Wolverine star Hugh Jackman), a former pro boxer before the sport was banned as inhumane.

Charlie now "manages" robot fighters on the boxing circuit where machines have replaced the athletes.

A lousy businessman and a cheat, Charlie owes big gambling debts. Then, along comes a golden opportunity to make some money.

His ex-girlfriend dies and leaves custody of their son Max (Dakota Goyo) to Charlie who has never met the boy and doesn't care. For a tidy sum of cash from Aunt Debra's new rich husband Marvin (James Rebhorn), Charlie will allow Debra (Hope Davis) to adopt the lad.

Not so fast.

Marvin wants some me-time with Debra, so Charlie reluctantly agrees to take Max for the summer - for half the cash upfront.

So off they go, two sitcom cliché characters: the irresponsible dad who refuses to grow up, and the precocious preteen who knows more about mechanics, computers, marketing and showmanship than any adult in the movie.

After Charlie's latest robo-fighter Noisy Boy gets destroyed in the ring, fate steps in by having the dad and son stumble onto - actually slide into - the previously mentioned G-2 sparring robot they call Atom.

The Kentons receive help from Charlie's former girlfriend Bailey ("Lost" star Evangeline Lilly), who turns her pappy's old Texas gym into a triage unit for junked robot boxers. (Just as well, because her gym never has a single client in it.)

Once Atom becomes operational, the robo-fighter works its way up from an undercard to a headliner, paving the way for Charlie and Max to challenge the mighty Zeus, an undefeated monster machine designed by an egocentric Japanese wiz (Karl Yune) and bankrolled by a snotty Russian hottie (Olga Fonda).

Goyo (last seen as the young "Thor") creates a lovable know-it-all as Max, but Jackman's irritating know-nothing-at-all dad remains a crass, contemptible character whose 11th-hour conversion to nice guy is way too late and never believable.

Levy directs "Real Steel" with sitcom overkill, instructing extras and supporting performers to exaggerate their reactions way beyond pathetically bad community theater proportions.

There's also a huge logistical mistake in "Real Steel."

To teach the G-2 to fight, Charlie demonstrates his own boxing moves that Atom copies while in "mimic mode."

Look closely.

Atom <I>mirrors</I> Charlie's moves, but doesn't duplicate them. So when Atom mirrors Charlie's left hook, the G-2 is actually throwing a right, not a left.

That means during the big bout with Zeus, Atom is actually throwing the <I>wrong punches </I>at its opponent.

This "Real Steel" is no real steal, that's for sure.

&lt;b&gt;"Real Steel"&lt;/b&gt;

★ ½

Starring: Hugh Jackman, Dakota Goyo, Evangeline Lilly, Anthony Mackie, Karl Yune

Directed by: Shawn Levy

Other: A Walt Disney Pictures release. Rated PG-13 for language, violence. 127 minutes