Finnish candlesticks evoke memories of wonderful trips

I have lots of objects in my house, accumulated over 30 years since we first moved here many years ago.

Many are from trips to Scandinavia. Today I have Finnish candlesticks on my mind. They are on a coffee table in the living room, and are favorites of mine. They are not “sticks” but chunks of glass that look like ice.

I am not very attached to material objects themselves — it's the memories that get me. Everywhere I look I can re-imagine wonderful times I had with my dear husband Baheej — the trips, the scenery, the people, the food, the music.

Objects can trigger nice associations, which helps when bereaved.

These Finnish candle sticks are something we brought home from our first trip to Helsinki, Finland. Helsinki is an especially lovely, cozy and inviting harbor town on the east coast of Finland. Although it's the capital, it's small and non-touristy compared to most international capital cities.

In Finland, Sweden, Norway and Denmark, many everyday items are made of glass or crystal and look like ice. One church in Stockholm has its whole alter and pulpit made of glass, so it looks like a group of ice sculptures. No wonder considering those long winters — and most of Scandinavia's northern provinces up inside the Arctic Circle.

Well, these particular Finnish candlesticks have a story that I enjoy remembering. We were out on a boat tour in Helsinki and arrived at an island way out beyond the inner harbor. It has the remnants of a huge old fort with caves inside. One cave was made into a beautiful restaurant. I think it was an old barracks for soldiers at one time. The island itself is a big park for hiking.

So we went inside the restaurant to have dinner. On each table were four of these wonderful candlesticks that looked like big chunks of ice, four different heights, with white candles. The room was glowing with candlelight. We had a wonderful dinner, eating reindeer, I think, and we hoped we could buy the candlesticks. However, they didn't have a gift shop. So Baheej asked the waiter if we could buy the candlesticks on our table.

The waiter went off to check with the manager but came back with the answer — “sorry, but no.” Not for sale. Baheej nicely persisted and after an hour or so, with Baheej applying all his powers of persuasion, they let us buy them! That was in the 1980s, and those very same candlesticks are still with me today.

And since then we have been to Helsinki many times, summer and winter. So these candlesticks are packed with lovely sensations. For instance, the Christmas season is glorious there, sparkling everywhere. Every inch of the cafes, restaurants, shops, hotels, lobbies and the main walking streets and boulevards are decorated and glowing. Every evening is filled with dance performances and classical music concerts. Late night after those performance are dinners. Once we saw the most innovative modern dance/ballet performance ever. I still remember it.

Our favorite cafe is the Strindberg cafe, cozy and right in the heart of the walking street. Strindberg is of course Swedish but he married a Finnish noblewoman, so the Finnish people claim part of him I guess. We are big Strindberg fans so we always spent lots time in that cafe.

On one of our summer trips to Finland, we took the train to the west coast — to the town of Turku, the second largest city, and with a medieval past. There is an old castle there that has a festival each summer. They stage a huge medieval feast in the castle complete with the staff, performers and musicians all in period dress. And food served the way it was then — long communal tables, absolutely everything eaten with your hands, mead to drink, and lots of period music, jesters and authentic fun. It's an extravaganza with all of us as part of the performance.

By chance we sat next to a Finnish painter who invited us to visit his studio in a nearby village the next day. We went and it was all fascinating.

The point is: All those objects we collect over the years are not clutter; they are part of the history of our lives, a personal journal so to speak.

We started out with sleek Scandinavian modern style, but now many more things lay about, more than in a modern Scandinavian home. But that's OK with me. It makes me happy to see them.

Once, on another trip to Helsinki we got off the boat on the wrong side of that same island and we had to hike across the whole, rather large, island to get to our favorite fort/cave restaurant! That was an unexpected adventure! But probably a good balance to that delicious and rich Finnish mushroom sauce.

• Susan Anderson-Khleif of Sleepy Hollow has a doctorate in family sociology from Harvard, taught at Wellesley College and is a retired Motorola executive. Contact her at sakhleif@comcast.net or see her blog longtermgrief.tumblr.com. See previous columns at www.dailyherald.com/topics/Anderson-Kleif-Susan.