How to handle the holidays while grieving
Here are suggestions from facilitators of a program called GriefShare: Surviving the Holidays for dealing with a loved one's death at this time of year:
• Realize the holidays will not be the same without your loved one who has passed.
• Make an inventory of your holiday traditions and celebrations.
• Assess which traditions and celebrations you can handle.
• Make a plan for how to approach holiday gatherings and how many to attend to avoid being "ambushed" by emotions.
• Talk about your plan so there is no awkwardness among relatives.
• Accept invitations tentatively; explain that you'd like to attend, but you might not feel up to it.
• Attend parties with a supportive person who can help you excuse yourself if you feel overwhelmed.
• Don't be afraid to change traditions or try something new.
• Don't feel forced to change traditions for the sake of changing.
• Remember that each person's grief journey and coping mechanisms are different.
• Allow friends, neighbors, co-workers and relatives to help you with holiday preparations and everyday tasks.
• Express your emotions, because suppression halts healing.
• Turn to faith, a grief group or a counselor for support.