Elgin soldier paralyzed in crash fights physical, financial challenges

In his dreams, Max Gross finds himself again as he walks, runs and moves through the world, confident in his path as a soldier about to begin his U.S. Army Ranger battalion assignment.

When the 21-year-old wakes up, reality hits him anew. He is paralyzed from the neck down, confined to his bed in his family's Elgin home, surrounded by military mementos and U.S. flags, one hanging in front of him and one affixed to the ceiling above his head.

Max's strong spirit, the same one that turned a defiant teenager into a disciplined soldier, remains undaunted - at least most days.

“I'm OK,” he said, his new, hoarse voice barely above a whisper. “Some days are harder than others. But I'm OK.”

The main reason he's OK, he said, is his family relentlessly has stood by his side, determined to care for him at home in the best way possible.

His father, Achim “Tom” Gross, who for many years raised his three children as a single dad, has been Max's biggest champion and successfully fought a decision by the Defense Health Agency to cut Max's at-home care last month.

“It's been a roller coaster,” Tom Gross said. “He's so strong, and all of a sudden he's so weak.”

The right decision

Max was injured in a car crash 13 months ago, when he and a fellow soldier were driving home in Max's car on Easter leave from Fort Campbell, Kentucky. They set off at 6:30 p.m.; Max drove for the first few hours and then his friend took the wheel. Max was asleep when, just before midnight along U.S. 41 in Indiana, the car hit the gravel, swerved and rolled over.

Max suffered two shattered vertebrae, while his friend - who apparently had dozed off - had minor injuries. His friend is now stationed in Afghanistan, Max said. “That's where I was supposed to go.”

Max, who grew up in South Elgin, enlisted at 18 at the behest of his father, who saw it as the only way to straighten out the rebellious son who cut school and dabbled in drugs and alcohol. “I strong-armed him,” Tom Gross said, “and he changed his life around.”

It was the right move, Max said. The Army struck the right chord in him, pushing him to become physically fit and motivating him to succeed.

“I thought I was too dumb to go to college,” he said. “When I enlisted, I realized how smart I am.”

The crash shattered his vision of the future. Max spent nearly a year in rehab and moved back home in February.

Private nurses, whose salaries are reimbursed by the Defense Health Agency - which provides care for active duty soldiers - take care of him from 7 a.m. to 11 p.m. His father, who is on medical leave from his job as a Metra conductor, and younger brother take turns sleeping overnight in an armchair by his side.

Max's sister and grandfather and his father's fiancee also keep him company and take him to the mall and bingo at the local VFW.

The health agency had decided to cut Max's nursing reimbursement to three hours a day effective April 1, which would have meant $18,000 monthly out of pocket to keep the same level of care, his father said. About 10 days later, the agency - which did not respond to a request for comment - reversed its decision, after Tom Gross protested and contacted an attorney.

“For any type of person who gave service to this country to get treated like this ...” Tom Gross said. “In the end it's about money. It's horrible.”

Looking ahead

Max will be discharged from the Army, likely later this month, and will transition into the Veterans Healthcare Administration, which likely will cut Max's nursing reimbursement to three hours a day, plus at least two home visits for checkups and respiratory therapy a month, said Rick Fox, public affairs officer for Edward Hines Jr. VA Hospital.

The VA also will give the family the option of getting Max into inpatient care, but Tom Gross won't hear of it. Instead, he has a plan to cobble together enough funding - including from Max's military stipend, Social Security, and the state department of human services - to keep him at home with the same level of nursing care.

A fundraiser in September at Walnut Speak Easy in Elgin really helped financially, he said.

Besides sleeping, Max likes to watch TV and talk to friends on the phone. He gets frequent visits from buddies like Luke Reinhofer of Bartlett, a former classmate at South Elgin High School.

“I think he deals with it pretty well. He's got a good attitude,” Reinhofer said. “Most of the time he's in pretty good spirits when I'm over there.”

Max also keeps up with friends on Facebook, using his smartphone with a mouth stylus. He occasionally posts upbeat messages such as, “This car accident will never stop me from partying hard and living life.”

But there are no posts about darker moments, like when he feels like a burden to his family. Sometimes, he said, he can't shake the thought he might have been better off dead.

What keeps him going is the hope that science will come to his rescue, he said, pointing to promising medical studies in areas such as epidural stimulation.

“They have made so much advancement in paralysis,” he said. “I have hope in medical research.”