On making another trip around the sun

As my high school and college classmates and I have gotten older, I have noticed that when birthday shoutouts go out on Facebook, many say they thank God for "another trip around the sun." This wasn't a saying that I grew up hearing, but it definitely has special meaning now in the middle years of middle age.

When I posted my birthday selfie on Facebook in August, thanking friends for their "warm and loving" well wishes, behind my smile was a great testimony to perseverance through the challenges of caring for my mother. My mother and I are summer babies, and my mom celebrated her 86th birthday in June. I marked this birthday as a significant milestone for her due to two serious health scares this year: a pneumonia hospitalization in February followed by another hospital stay due to a pulmonary embolism in April.

In one of my August columns last year, I talked about "slowing down on the traffic jam of life," which resonated with many readers, and I am continuing to learn how to take one day at a time as I balance work and caring for my mother. I have begun to follow more research on caregiving, looking to see how my situation compares to others nationally, and some statistics that I have come across have shown me how blessed I am.

For example, according to Guardian Life findings from 2023, 41% of caregivers "report low overall well-being," only 23% stated their mental health was "good," 40% shared that their stress levels have increased due to their caregiving responsibilities, and 34.8% of caregivers aged 45 to 64 had a least two chronic conditions. I am fortunate to be in great health, able to maintain my wellness and endurance, and to be surrounded by a supportive pastor and church family who lift me up in prayer. This has significantly contributed to my not becoming overtaken by stress or depression.

Now, I have had my struggles in caregiving, as everyone else going through this lifestyle adjustment has. I can recall many times when I got frustrated with my mother for not eating the way she should, not drinking enough water, and not following directions for her in-home therapy. But in those moments when I was throwing up my hands in weariness, God reminded me to think about how my mother feels being dependent on me, being separated from her close friends back home in Georgia, and adapting to her new surroundings.

I am grateful for the things my mother and I can still enjoy together, the simple things that I used to take for granted. On the last day of August (I celebrated my birthday the entire month), Mom and I had some vanilla ice cream and apple pie, and with all that we have been through this year, I cherished every minute.

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