Honoring the full story of adoption

November is National Adoption Month — a time to celebrate the families formed through adoption and the love that binds them together. As both an adoption social worker with Lutheran Child and Family Services of Illinois and an adoptive parent, I’ve had the privilege of walking alongside many families through this journey — those pursuing identified domestic adoption, international adoption and those adopting waiting children from the foster care system.

While each path looks different, they share a common thread: every adoption begins with loss and love. For children, it may be the loss of a first family, familiar places, or a sense of identity. For birth parents, it’s the pain of separation, even when the decision is made with deep love. And for adoptive parents, there can be grief tied to infertility, unmet expectations or the complexities of parenting a child who has experienced trauma.

Recognizing this doesn’t diminish the joy of adoption and love behind it — it gives it honesty and depth. Families who approach adoption with openness, empathy and a commitment to ongoing learning are best equipped to help children heal and thrive.

This National Adoption Month, let’s celebrate the beauty of adoption while also honoring the hard truths beneath it. By embracing both love and loss, we create stronger families and a more compassionate community for everyone touched by adoption.

Ann Jongsma

Oak Brook