Grief & healing: Keeping in touch

It's very important to keep in touch with old friends and relatives. Often someone is both.

I have two dear sisters-in-law, Noelle and Joni. I’ve just heard from Noelle that she’s planning on coming here to Sleepy Hollow to visit me this spring. I’m just delighted! It will be wonderful to just have time to talk together and reminisce. Her husband, who was Baheej’s elder brother, died just last year.

I haven’t seen Noelle in person for some years, although we are in regular touch by phone, email and text. It’s hard even to believe how fast time passes.

I’m also in touch over time with my sweet sister-in-law Joni, my brother Nic’s wife. Nic died some years ago. We were very close and I’ve known Joni since we were 18. We’re the same age.

Yesterday Noelle had been out in Durham, New Hampshire, to the cemetery visiting the graves of her husband, my dear Baheej, and her brother. They are all in our Khleif family plot, which was bought by Bud and Noelle years ago. She was checking on the winter flower baskets she had left there for decoration. I was so glad to hear about that. Wish I could have been there, too.

As usual I have also been in touch with my old friend Diane. We’ve been friends since graduate school. And have stayed in touch. We share a lot of personal experiences and history.

The point is: Continuity in our friendships and relationships make life richer. It sure does for me.

• Susan Anderson-Khleif of Sleepy Hollow has a doctorate in family sociology from Harvard, taught at Wellesley College and is a retired Motorola executive. Contact her at sakhleif@aol.com.