Indiana couple's 4-year quest to erase debt leads to book

GREENWOOD, Ind. (AP) - Call it a victory dance.

Cherie and Brian Lowe were in the midst of a four-year quest to wipe out $127,482.30 of accumulated debt, from student loans, credit cards, a personal loan, medical bills and a furniture payment plan. The Lowes and their two young daughters took on their "Debt Dragon" together, as a family. They learned to save more and spend less, becoming more intentional and making better choices.

Each of them thought about what they'd like to do once the Dragon was gone. Anna, their older daughter, wanted to visit Great Wolf Lodge, a water park at King's Island in Cincinnati. On a trip to a store with Cherie - before the debt was paid off - Anna pulled a stuffed animal from a shelf and looked at it longingly.

"She said, 'Mom, I really want this, but I want to go to Great Wolf Lodge more,'" Cherie recalled earlier this month. "And I did this mom-in-the-aisle fist-pump."

The positive impact of their effort showed in that moment.

Today, the Lowes' debt mountain is gone. The family surmounted it gradually. "We basically nickel-and-dimed ourselves into debt, and basically nickel-and-dimed ourselves out of it," Cherie told the Tribune-Star (http://bit.ly/1uRmDJN ).

Their strategies, experiences, pitfalls and suggestions, culled from their journey, fill the 229 pages of Cheri's new book, "Slaying the Debt Dragon: How One Family Conquered Their Money Monster and Found an Inspired Happily Ever After" (Tyndale House Publishers). Cherie signed copies of the book on a return trip to the Wabash Valley, where she grew up in the small Sullivan County town of Fairbanks and graduated from North Central High School in 1995. Cherie, Brian and their kids now live in Greenwood.

In writing "Slaying the Debt Dragon," Cherie aims for people anywhere struggling with debt to know they're not alone. That feeling was difficult for her and Brian, a college-educated couple. Cherie graduated from Asbury University in Kentucky, and Brian from Indiana State University and then Indiana University School of Law.

"It feels shameful, and it feels like you're the only ones that screwed up, and we're intelligent people," she said. "That feeling of loneliness and isolation prevents (people) from taking (the debt payoff) on." In fact, among American families in which the head of household is under age 40, 37 percent had outstanding student-loan debt, according to the Pew Research Center. Cherie and Brian both are 38.

They didn't realize the depths of their total debt until Brian began calculating their expenses, once they knew their second daughter, Zoe, was on the way. His number-crunching gave them their ah-ha moment. As Cherie writes in the book, "I nearly passed out myself when Brian first showed me the bottom-line debt total." Right down to the penny, $127,482.30.

They weren't living extravagantly. Rather, their debt included, as the book puts it, "run-of-the-mill expenses." Given that reality, the Lowes chose to not try tackling it all at once, by adopting a cold-turkey lifestyle. They found ways to pay down the debt faster than the 15 years it would've taken by making minimum monthly payments.

Brian read "The Total Money Makeover" by personal finance guru Dave Ramsey. Cherie began writing an online blog on frugal living called "The Queen of Free." That was 2008. Brian posed the question, "How would our lives look different without debt?" Cherie said. "Really, that 'dreaming big' category is what motivated me."

In one early change, Brian adjusted his tax withholdings at work. It meant they wouldn't get a tax refund check, but the move also gave them an extra $100 per month, which they began applying toward debt payoffs. Brian took on two extra jobs, working from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. three days a week. "He worked very long hours," Cherie said.

She decided to leave a part-time job she enjoyed, because the costs of travel and food were too high compared to her earnings. That freed her to focus on cost-cutting at home. Cherie learned how to make her own household goods, such as laundry detergent. (It's made with a mix of borax, a cleaner like OxiClean, washing soda and white vinegar.) The price of making detergent is one-10th of the store price.

That seems like a lot of work for such a small dividend, but such homemade products kept the Lowes from making a run to the store, where the quest for just one needed item typically ends up with the purchase of four or five bags full of other stuff.

Brian became the King of Free, and the kids the Princess Eldest and Princess Youngest. They packed lunches daily. Brian stayed away from restaurants for 2 1/2 years during work time, and the family limited eating out to occasional stops. They scraped together $1,000 to build an emergency fund, to prevent them from using credit cards when the washing machine breaks or a car needs a new muffler. (A study by finance publication BankRate found that only 38 percent of American families have enough savings to cover such unexpected expenses.) They personified their $127,482.30 negative balance, naming it the Debt Dragon. "We literally wrote letters to the dragon," Cherie said. That characterization helped the couple team up against "being attacked from the outside." Cherie recommends debt-slayers do the same, perhaps using "Fred Johnson."

"Fred Johnson wants to destroy your marriage. Fred Johnson wants to keep your kids from going to college," Cherie said, rhetorically.

In "Slaying the Debt Dragon," Cherie outlines six tips for couples to maintain a healthy marriage while tackling debt: Put the kids to bed on time; exercise together; share books you're reading for inspiration; discuss purchases beforehand; dream big about post-debt life; and remember your vows. It helped the Lowes. "We're still married and like being with each other," Cherie said, "so I count that as victory."

Her advice is spot-on, said Scot Longyear, a friend and senior pastor at Maryland Community Church in Terre Haute. Longyear, one of the endorsers of her book, explained, "The majority of arguments in marriage are caused by money."

Longyear pointed to the biblical verse in the Book of Matthew, through which people can gauge their relationship with money and debt. It reads, "For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also."

"I think it's really foundational, and I think it's really spiritual," Longyear said. "Do you own the money, or does it own you?"

The Lowes erased the last of the debt in 2012. (They still have a mortgage, Cherie clarified.) They "definitely" leaned on their religious faith - the grace and forgiveness of God - throughout the journey, she said.

Life afterward, Cherie added, differs somewhat from the days before their debt-slaying quest. "A lot of things have changed. A lot of things are the same," she said. She still uses coupons, makes detergent and budgets more precisely. They're also able to be more generous, by donating to a friend's mission trip, 5K-run or church fundraiser. Their kids learned with them. They grew closer, having worked together.

For young couples, Cherie offers a suggestion. "If you're on the brink of getting married, you cannot communicate enough about your expenses."

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Information from: Tribune-Star, http://www.tribstar.com