Heartless 'Fame' remake just lame
As I drove away from a Chicago screening of Kevin Tancharoen's "Fame" Wednesday night, I turned on 100.3 FM on the car radio and guess what I heard?
Irene Cara belting out the title song to the original 1980 hit musical "Fame."
In that moment, I realized Cara packed more passion and talent into a single song than Tancharoen could squeeze into an entire shallow, vacuous remake.
His "Fame" uses the same plot and character types as Alan Parker's original film, except that Tancharoen blunts Parker's pain and realism, diminishes the drama's heart by at least two sizes, and steps all over the cast's sheer joy of performing.
The showcase scene from Parker's "Fame" was an impromptu "concert" performed by students at the (then) New York Academy for Performing Arts. Every student in the school spontaneously breaks into a jubilant musical number, with dancers and musicians merging in a joyful celebration that spills into New York streets, snarling traffic, yet delighting everyone.
In Tancharoen's "Fame," a keyboardist, drummer and dancers start groovin', but the scene fizzles out and shifts over to a couple of characters who could use a few lessons from their acting teacher Mr. Dowd (Charles S. Dutton).
"Fame" begins with the auditions, 200 students to be chosen from 10,000 applicants.
The chosen ones are a collection of virtual stereotypes, including the angry young black actor Malik (Collins Pennie); the naive and apparently talentless white girl Jenny (Kay Panabaker); the classical pianist who really wants to sing Denise (Naturi Naughton); the fetching blonde dancer Alice (Kherington Payne); the nerdy would-be film director Neil (Paul Iacono); and the Zac Efron knock-off Marco (Asher Book), who sings beautifully and looks cute.
Parker's film front-loaded each main character's family life, so we got to know a little bit about the students before their challenges began. We knew what was at stake.
The remake goes straight to the auditions followed by the freshman, sophomore, junior and senior years. The students' back stories then leach out in expository dribbles of phony, forced parental conflicts.
The teaching staff isn't exactly To Sir With Love, either.
When Dowd isn't lecturing Malik about his attitude ("The theater is not a place for anger, Malik!"), he's hammering keyboardist Victor (Walter Perez) for reinterpreting Bach. ("Study, drill and technique do not stifle talent! They feed it!")
Debbie Allen, a holdover from the 1980 film, plays the wise principal. Kelsey Grammer rejoins his "Frasier" co-star Bebe Neuwirth as glowering taskmasters who appear to have had their characters eviscerated in the editing software.
Former "Will & Grace" co-star Megan Mullally gets a chance to showcase her singing talents as frustrated Fran, who gave up her dream of performing and had to settle for a teaching job. (Gee, that's a happy thought to instill in the youngsters.)
Tancharoen's "Fame" greatly tones down Parker's R-rated use of language and nudity, particularly in Irene Cara's humiliating and painful "audition" in which she tearfully and reluctantly strips on camera for a stranger as she allows her desire to get a job to trump her dignity.
It's a powerful scene not re-created in the remake, which substitutes a much milder moment in which naive Jenny allows herself to be taped for an "audition" with her slimy former fellow student Andy (Cody Longo).
Remember Cara's Oscar-winning song "Fame" with its dynamic lyrics, "I can catch the moon in my hands, don't you know who I am?"
The remake's disappointing signature song, performed nicely by Naughton, includes such hackneyed lyrics as "Be yourself" and "Hold on to your dreams, don't let them go!"
Maybe Malik had the right idea all along.
We should be angry.
"Fame"
Rating: 2 stars
Starring: Naturi Naughton, Kay Panabaker, Kelsey Grammer, Megan Mullally, Bebe Neuwirth, Charles S. Dutton, Debbie Allen
Directed by: Kevin Tancharoen
Other: An MGM release. Rated PG. 107 minutes.