Son recalls last words with a loving family

Words escape Jeff Engelhardt in describing the sudden loss of the three family members he calls his "best friends" who died in a stabbing rampage in Hoffman Estates.

All he knows is, "I love my whole family. I'm going to miss them forever - I don't think I'll ever stop missing them," the Southern Illinois University junior said Saturday.

The boyfriend of Jeff Engelhardt's older sister, Amanda, is charged with killing his father, Alan Engelhardt, 57, his younger sister Conant High School senior Laura, 18, and maternal grandmother Marlene Gacek, 73, on Friday.

D'Andre D. Howard, a 20-year-old ward of the state with a history of mental illness and criminal arrests, had been dating Amanda Engelhardt, 23, for three years, according to authorities, and they had a child together.

On Saturday, Cook County Judge Samuel Betar denied bond for Howard, who was under police guard at Alexian Brothers Medical Center in Elk Grove Village. He is recovering from wounds inflicted by Laura, who risked her life in a desperate attempt to help her mother and sister.

"I get a sense Laura had no fear ... Laura was fighting for her family," the Rev. Bill Cate said during a service Saturday evening at St. Peter Lutheran Church in Schaumburg where the Engelhardt family attended.

Howard is charged with first-degree murder, attempted murder and aggravated unlawful restraint.

Jeff, Laura and Amanda's mother, Shelly Engelhardt, 52, also was attacked and was in critical condition Saturday at St. Alexius Hospital in Hoffman Estates.

Public Defender Stephen Herczeg said Howard, who has lived in Chicago most of his life, had been abused and neglected as a child and suffered from mental health issues but did not elaborate. Illinois Department of Children and Family Services officials had no comment.

Howard's parents' rights to custody were terminated in 2001, officials said, and the state took over his care.

In 2004, he was charged as a juvenile with aggravated criminal sexual abuse.

For Jeff Engelhardt and other relatives, the grief "hasn't set in yet."

He described his family as incredibly close-knit and events laid out in bond court show a group of individuals doing their utmost to protect each other from deadly violence.

The tragedy at the Engelhardt home stemmed from a quarrel between Amanda Engelhardt and Howard late Thursday over accusations of infidelity - an argument that began at their apartment in the 900 block of Evanston Street in Hoffman Estates, police said.

Howard ordered Engelhardt out and she left with their 8-month-old baby daughter to a place she felt safe - her parents' home in the 1000 block of Bluebonnet Lane.

Prosecutors allege Howard followed Amanda and the argument continued at 1:30 a.m., waking up Shelly and Laura, who rushed down to the first floor to help.

"The defendant became increasingly angry," Cook County prosecutor Maria McCarthy said. "He grabbed a butcher knife and waved it in his girlfriend's face."

Howard pushed Shelly Engelhardt with the knife also, then used yarn to tie up the women and stuffed a sock in Laura's mouth. He was interrupted by Shelly's sister, who is disabled, and he ordered her to sit on the couch, McCarthy said.

At some point, Howard started to untie Laura, who seized the butcher knife and cut him on the arm. He wrestled the weapon away and slashed at her and Shelly.

The commotion drew Marilyn Gacek down to the kitchen where Howard killed her, McCarthy said.

The next victim was Alan Engelhardt, who confronted Howard in the kitchen. Howard slit Engelhardt's throat, but before he died he managed to stagger into the family room where his teenage daughter and wife lay wounded.

The last family member to come on the scene was Alan's mother, who is 85. "She saw her son lying lifeless," McCarthy said.

Amanda Engelhardt, who along with her paternal grandmother and aunt was physically uninjured, pleaded with Howard to let her call 911 but he ripped the phone jack from the wall, prosecutors said.

After trying to wipe the blood off the kitchen floor with bleach, Howard apparently relented and allowed Amanda to alert police, which she did around 6:44 a.m.

Laura died in hospital Friday afternoon but was conscious and able to tell authorities what happened, police said. She suffered stab wounds to her back, stomach, abdomen and aorta.

The Cook County Medical Examiner's Office conducted autopsies Saturday and determined that all three died of stab wounds.

A close friend and neighbor of the Engelhardts, Gayle Irvin sat in shock during bond court Saturday morning. She recalled a loving family that supported each other through thick and thin. "I'm just numb," Irvin said. "I don't know why someone could have so much hate."

Alan Engelhardt was a landscaper who switched to stay-at-home dad and took to it naturally - ferrying kids around to school, games and an American Idol concert at the state fair for Laura.

He was capable of coaching a basketball team to victory and cooking a memorable meal, Jeff Engelhardt said.

"He was a giver - he'd do anything for anybody. He wanted to make everyone's life as easy as possible," Jeff said. Alan also was an eager reader of his son's stories - Engelhardt is managing editor at SIU's Daily Egyptian.

Laura Engelhardt wasn't the type of teen who talked behind people backs, her friends said. The little girl who was a "bit of a tomboy," according to her brother, grew up to aspire to be a veterinarian and had just decided to attend the University of Missouri in the fall. She belonged to the Conant band and loved playing basketball and volleyball. Classmates said jokingly her hustle made up for the bruises she earned on the court.

"We were best friends, when we were younger we always hung out together," Jeff said.

When Marilyn Gacek's husband died, her daughter and son-in-law moved to the house on Bluebonnet Lane and they put on an addition.

"It was a lot of fun growing up," Jeff Engelhardt said.

He recalled his grandmother as a warm person and "good listener." "We could have conversations for hours," he said. "She was always there."

The birth of Howard and Amanda's child brought new joy to her grandparents, Irvin said. "They just adored the baby," she noted, adding that Shelly and Alan supported the couple and had talked about buying a car for them.

But she noticed tensions between Howard and the Engelhardts also, saying he was disrespectful to Amanda's parents.

In 2004, Howard was convicted in juvenile court of aggravated criminal sexual assault in Cook County. He violated his probation but was placed on probation again in 2006, officials said. He also is scheduled to appear in court this May on a battery charge in Hoffman Estates.

In addition, there is an order of protection against him issued by a Lake County judge. Howard's next court date is Monday.

McCarthy is asking that the case be treated as a capital crime.

The road leading up to the Engelhardts was still blocked off Saturday afternoon as investigators walked in and out of the home.

Close friend Mimi David was with Amanda Engelhardt Friday night at a gathering at a relative's house in Mount Prospect. "The family is still in shock," David said. "... It's a shame something so senseless had to happen to them."

David did not know Howard. "Funny things sometimes happen when people are in relationships," she said, "and sometimes people just snap."

Funeral arrangements are pending. Meanwhile, Conant High School officials said counselors will be available for students on Monday and a memorial is expected to be organized.

Daily Herald Staff Writers Jack Komperda, Susan Sarkauskas and Ashok Selvam contributed to this report.

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