Hirsch-Jackson friendship means the world to both

During the course of his high school career, Zach Hirsch has hit many momentum-turning 3-point baskets from the corner.

On the baseball diamond, the hard-throwing left-hander has recorded his share of inning-ending strikeouts.

And while his athletic achievements have been superlative - he's headed to the University of Nebraska on a baseball scholarship - I would argue that the best move of Hirsch's career occurred this past December in, of all places, the St. Charles North cafeteria.

That's the day Hirsch decided to get up from his customary lunchroom spot and sit with Graham Jackson.

It's not an everyday occurrence that an 18-year-old senior eats lunch across from a 14-year-old freshman.

Especially a 14-year-old freshman who has autism - specifically, Asperger's syndrome.

"I noticed that he was sitting all by himself," said Hirsch. "I knew David Johnson (basketball teammate) was Graham's cousin so I thought I'd say hey to him.

"He knew who I was from watching basketball and I had seen him at our games. We immediately hit it off. We talked sports and other things."

That night, Graham, a huge sports fan, mentioned to his mom that he ate lunch with Hirsch earlier in the day.

"I'm thinking, 'yah, right,'" said Graham's mom, Melissa. "It was very hard for me to believe. When I learned it really did happen, I figured it would be a one-shot thing."

She was so wrong.

The next day, Zach and Graham met again for lunch and they've sat together every day since.

Their conversations, which often center on what happened in the previous day's game, statistics, favorite teams and players, also include talks about classes, attending college - and life.

"Zach's a very nice guy," said Graham, a big Chicago Cubs and Boston Red Sox fan who lists David Ortiz among his favorite ballplayers. "He's certainly someone I've talked to a lot."

"Graham's got a great memory," said Hirsch. "Any day after basketball games, he'd talk about certain moments and specific plays, even a critique on the refs.

"When you're out there playing, sometimes you get a little bit caught up in the moment to remember everything. His insight on the game helped give me perspective."

In turn, Hirsch's lunchroom decision made 4 months ago has had a life-changing impact on Graham.

"It is very difficult for me to put into words the profoundness of this experience," said Melissa, who is a Program Supervisor for Mid-Valley Special Education Cooperative in St. Charles. "I still have trouble getting my mind around it.

"It has helped my son in every way you can imagine. It has altered the course of his life."

Autism is a disorder which often affects speech, learning and social skill development. Its hallmark feature is impaired social interaction.

"As a result, peer interaction is difficult for Graham," said his mom, who grew up in a sports-minded family. "He generally avoids it."

That didn't stop Graham from becoming a loyal attendee of North Stars basketball games - home and away - this past season.

Watching his cousin (Johnson), Hirsch and the rest of the team play became a passion. With it brought great experiences for both mother and son.

"I won't ever forget the regional championship game in DeKalb," said Melissa. "After the team won, all of the players and coaches were down on the floor celebrating and cutting down the nets.

"Graham wanted to go down there but I held him back until the picture taking was over."

Then she let her son loose.

"I watched Graham go into this sea of people," she said. "And the response he got from them was unbelievable.

"Players were giving him high-fives and celebrating with him. You have to remember that this is everything he hates - the noise and the touching."

"My favorite memory (from the basketball season) is when we won regionals," said Graham.

Last Friday, Graham experienced another thrill when he served as the varsity baseball team helper (a role he will have the remainder of the season) during St. Charles North's 3-2 victory over Waubonsie Valley.

"I was in the dugout the whole game," said Graham, who wore a St. Charles North summer jersey that team member Ryan Hudspeth presented him with earlier in the day.

"I had tears rolling down my face watching him stand with the team along the third-base line for the National Anthem and then celebrating with players after the game," said Melissa.

Both Graham and Zach have benefited from their relationship.

"I've learned that it is worth it to challenge yourself even when you don't want to," said Graham who will turn 15 Saturday.

"Graham has taught me a lot about life," admitted Hirsch. "First of all, that it's good to get to know many kinds of people and to try and approach people you don't necessarily hang out with.

"He's a patient, soft-spoken, very intelligent person."

As is Hirsch.

"It took time, patience and effort for Zach to approach Graham that day in the cafeteria," said Melissa. "I'm sure literally hundreds of students had seen him sitting there by himself but only Zach tried to do something about it.

"Speaking professionally, you can't make relationships like this happen artificially - Zach made it happen. You don't know how rare and precious it is."

Melissa has seen tremendous changes in her son since December.

"He has a desire for social interaction that he never had before," she said. "And the confidence in his ability to interact has increased. I'm so proud of him for the way he has taken some big chances, which is hard for him.

"This is an experience I haven't had in a long time - I pinch myself every hour just to make sure it's really happening.

"Zach is the first friend Graham has ever had - and I couldn't have picked a better friend for him."

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