The Kiss-Cam Controversy

Until last week, most of us had never heard of the data company Astronomer or its then CEO, Andy Byron. That was before he attended a Coldplay concert in Massachusetts on Wednesday with a woman later identified as the head of human resources at the company. The two were caught by the "kiss cam" at the concert; he was embracing her. When they realized they had been caught on camera, she covered her face, and he ducked out of the frame. Chris Martin, Coldplay's lead singer, took note: "Oh, look at these two. You're all right. You're OK. Oh, what? Either they're having an affair or they're just very shy."

The moment went viral and cost Byron his job. It got millions of views, and Byron was identified as a married CEO embracing a woman who was not his wife. On Friday, the Company announced that Byron had been put on leave. On Saturday, they announced that he had "tendered his resignation, and the Board of Directors has accepted." The company made clear that the decision was not his. "As stated previously, Astronomer is committed to the values and culture that have guided us since our founding," the company said. "Our leaders are expected to set the standard in both conduct and accountability, and recently, that standard was not met."

Ugh.

This is not what "Me Too" should be about.

Byron's wife has every reason to be angry at her husband. But what business is this of ours?

In all of the coverage, and there has been a lot, there has been no suggestion that any coercion was involved, or that Byron abused his power as CEO, or that any advances he made were unwelcome. There has been no claim by anyone that he created a hostile environment for women, or for this woman in particular, at Astronomer. The company does not claim that there was an independent investigation that found any evidence of sexual harassment, which requires that advances be unwelcome, that there was some quid pro quo behind this relationship, or that this woman or any other woman was forced to work in a pervasively hostile environment. This is all about the internet, and the power of viral videos to expose private conduct.

Writing in The New York Times, Helen Schulman hailed the "Coldplay Concert Shame" as "something to celebrate." Schulman, a novelist and short story writer, found "something refreshing about learning that someone somewhere was taking responsibility for his actions, even if he probably had no choice." Of course he had no choice. That is the point. He was terminated for what should count as personal and private conduct, at least for all we know. It wasn't about "shame." It was an invitation for backlash.

There are many people (including, it seems, the majority who voted for Donald Trump) who think the "Me Too" movement went too far. The goal was and is to protect those who are the victims of abuse of power. It was not to publicly shame those who have extra-marital relationships. Recognizing the difference between private conduct and abuse of power is critical to protecting the victims of sexual harassment. Failure to respect that difference and honor that line is the fastest way to strip the real victims of sexual wrongdoing of the protection of the law, which we have worked so hard to provide.

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