Grief & healing: Coping with multiple health problems
Health is a blessing. And these days many people do try to live a healthy lifestyle and diet to keep feeling good and protect their overall health.
But as the years move forward, problematic medical conditions tend to pile up. Before we know it becomes quite a list. Possibly including some of these:
• High blood pressure
• High cholesterol
• Arthritis
• Achy joints
• Gaining weight
• Difficulties walking
• Breathing problems
• Heart conditions
• Dental problems
• Unsteady balance
These can start weighing very heavily on our activity, mood and spirit.
We may have to start curtailing our usual daily routine, which keeps us at home much more and could result in a sort of social isolation. And also a sense of loss. There are many sources loss giving rise to grief.
My dear husband Baheej was very sociable, and absolutely avoided spending too much time alone. He felt that was not healthy. I like my “me time,” but I agreed with him.
So what shall we do? Well, we need to reach out. Here are some suggestions:
• Invite people over. This can be simple. Could just be some cookies or pastries and coffee. Or could be cheese and crackers and fruit, and a glass of wine or soft drink.
• Become a correspondent, a writer of cards and letters. Even though many people rely on email and texting, people still like to get letters in their mailbox.
• Get a pet. It’s a comfort to have a cat or dog pattering about the house. I have two sweet kitties which are a joy to have around.
• Call a friend and chat. See how they are and let them know how you are doing. I know I always enjoy calls from friends.
So — write to people, call friends and keep in touch.
The point is: Just as with most of life, we need to change many of our life routines and habits over the years. We just need to make an effort to adjust and cope. It’s a lesson I learned from Baheej.
• Susan Anderson-Khleif of Sleepy Hollow has a doctorate in family sociology from Harvard, taught at Wellesley College and is a retired Motorola executive. Contact her at sakhleif@aol.com.