Strategies to combat bullying and empower children
Childhood bullying is a pressing issue. It often causes its targets lasting harm, such as anxiety, depression, substance use and an inability to form healthy relationships. And, with the advent of social media, it’s even more difficult to protect our children. It’s imperative we teach them how to handle being bullied or standing up when they see others affected.
Open communication is the first step. Parents must foster a safe and trusting environment where children can express their concerns, experiences and fears without being judged or reprimanded.
Our children pick up and react to our emotional states, so remaining calm is key. When hearing troubling news, focus on your breathing, modulate your speech and carefully choose your words.
Don’t be afraid to take time to think about and digest what your child shares. Ask them how they’re feeling and validate those thoughts and emotions to create a safe space. Teaching them the importance and need to communicate where other adults are in charge is an essential, life-long skill.
After establishing open communication, role playing can be an effective tool. Act out different scenarios with your child where they’re being bullied or witnessing bullying. This will help them handle these situations when they occur.
Teaching them to stay calm, communicate directly, be confident and even use distraction and humor can be helpful. Much like playing an instrument or a sport, practice will prepare them for the main event.
General strategies to help deal with bullying — and life in general — include teaching positive social skills and fostering empathy, self confidence and kindness.
Understanding the feelings and perspectives of others, feeling secure in themselves and treating others with respect and kindness are key to raising children able to handle being bullied and stand up for others. Discussion, books, movies and even certain apps are useful in teaching these skills and traits.
Most importantly, you must model what you teach. Children are very observant, learning more from what we do than what we say. Being kind ourselves, showing empathy, being confident and genuine and demonstrating how to handle conflicts in a healthy and productive way are the best strategies to teach children how to manage difficult and uncomfortable situations.
You can empower your children, arming them with the tools and strategies they need to not only combat bullies, but to build healthy relationships and create a more supportive, inclusive and positive environment for all.
• Children’s health is a continuing series with this week’s column submitted by Ascension Illinois. Cecelia Horan, who has a doctorate in psychology, is the director of child, adolescent and perinatal intensive outpatient services at Ascension Illinois Behavioral Health.