'Feeling tired' this time of year is common; you can find balance

I sometimes just get tired. Not sleepy tired, although we all do that. I mean just tired of all the things on the “to do” list. And the appointment list. And even the social commitments list. We all have these lists, even if they are only in your head.

Now, this is not going to be a complaining column. Just thought it's a topic worth mentioning because I think it's common, but not a topic for conversation. And certainly not in the holiday season! People just say they are busy.

Most do not want to be around a complainer. And we all know that the proper response to the greeting, “How are you?” is “Fine,” or “Good” or at least “OK.” So there's really no place to mention “tired” or just exhausted.

I think most of the “to do” items that pile up are relatively simple matters — like two cars that need an oil change, garbage cans that need to be taken to the curb, a stack of monthly bills to pay, errands to run, all the endless household tasks.

And it's so easy to get overcommitted, overextended, even though each activity or cause is a worthy one, and each social event is inviting. It's easy for a person who lives alone, and especially if bereaved, to find themselves in this situation. People are often either too isolated, or too busy! We need some balance.

So what to do?

Here are some of the things that have worked for me:

• Build something nice into each day, something for yourself. Could be a small respite but renewing. A little drive, a walk, a lunch out at a nearby cafe or restaurant. Some change of pace.

• Watch a movie, or favorite TV show. This is usually a pleasant distraction, a break from the to do list.

• Call a friend who likes to have a “real conversation,” a person who has some similar interests.

• Take a little nap, nothing wrong with that.

• Get help with the house, yard, shopping. Rely more on home delivery.

• Free yourself from some commitments. And say, “Sorry, I can't do it,” “I'm not free that day,” or just say, “No thank you” more often.

The point is: Some of the “tired” or “exhausted” problem is actually in our hands to solve. We can at least take off some of the pressure.

There is one season that does not make me tired — and it's this present season! Now through the new year. It's a time of joy and celebration. I find it invigorating. So let it be uplifting, another way to combat exhaustion and enjoy the good things of life. My beloved Baheej loved this season so I'm sure he's here with me in spirit, helping and smiling.

• Susan Anderson-Khleif of Sleepy Hollow has a doctorate in family sociology from Harvard, taught at Wellesley College and is a retired Motorola executive. Contact her at sakhleif@comcast.net or see her blog longtermgrief.tumblr.com. See previous columns at www.dailyherald.com/topics/Anderson-Kleif-Susan.