Lifestyle

St. Charles couple starts toy drive in memory of their son

Posted November 20, 2022 10:00 pm

By Kim Becker

Tom and Jen Stopka with Tommy. The Stopkas are holding the second annual Toys for Tommy drive to benefit the Tri-City Salvation Army. Donations are due by Dec. 1 and delivered by Dec. 3, Tommy's birthday. Courtesy of Jen Stopka

Tom and Jen Stopka are taking the worst time in their life and using it to bring joy to kids in need.

The St. Charles couple's 18-month-old son Tommy died in June of 2020 in a drowning incident near their home. To keep his memory alive, the Stopkas decided to start a toy drive, Toys for Tommy, to benefit the Tri-City Salvation Army.

This will be the second official year for the drive.

Tommy Stopka loved his toy Jeep. That is why his parents, Jen and Tom Stopka of St. Charles, donate one for their Toys for Tommy drive in their son's honor. Courtesy of Jen Stopka

"We actually got the idea from my mother-in-law. That first year we donated this toy Jeep that Tommy loved along with other toys to my sister-in-law's church. The pastor there really helped us through that time," Jen said. "But then we decided we wanted to open it up to the entire community."

Donations for the drive are due by Dec. 1 and will be dropped off at the Tri-City Salvation Army in St. Charles on Dec. 3, which is Tommy's birthday.

"It's a way to keep his memory alive instead of sadness," Jen said. "It gives us something positive to focus on. It is symbolic, almost therapeutic."

Tommy Stopka had a spunky personality. "Tommy was a ball of energy," his mom Jen said. "He would do anything to get you to laugh. He never sat still, and he was just the happiest guy." Tommy drowned when was 18 months old. His parents hold a toy drive in his honor. Courtesy of Jen Stopka

Last year's event was a huge success. Thanks to friends and family, the drive garnered 15 new bicycles, electric and manual scooters, a ride-in Jeep car, books, games, toys for all ages and more than $1,200 in gift cards for older children.

The Stopka family is hoping to help fill those needs and do as well as last year, but are a little behind thanks to their newest arrival. Tommy's baby sister Lily was born on Oct. 21, joining big sister Mae, 2.

"I am not sure this year will be quite as big. We've been a little busy," Jen said.

Tom and Jen Stopka with Tommy's sisters, Mae, 2, and newborn Lily, who was born Oct. 21. Courtesy of Jen Stopka

But there are plenty of ways the public can help.

Donations can be dropped off at the Stopka family business, Trellis Farm and Garden, at two locations: 2N492 Kirk Road, St. Charles, or 40W296 Wasco Road, Campton Hills.

There is also an Amazon registry gift list at www.amazon.com/registries/custom/2YK9BD757SLDI/guest-view, or search Toys for Tommy. Jen said the purchased items are shipped directly to their house.

The toy drive provided a nice lift for the Tri-City Salvation Army during a busy holiday season.

"It was incredibly helpful," said Lt. Dena Smith, who runs the organization with her husband, Lt. Scott Smith. "It allows us one more community partner to help meet our needs. This has grown so much."

Smith said the organization is looking for toys for ages 17 and younger but emphasizes that they encourage gift cards in $25 increments for teens, who she referred to as their "forgotten angels."

"People really struggle with what to get the teens," Smith said.

Last year, the Salvation Army helped 600 kids. This year, families who are registered will be able to go through the warehouse and pick out age-appropriate toys for their kids Dec. 14-16 at 1710 S. Seventh Ave. in St. Charles.

Tommy Stopka loved riding the lawn mower with his dad, Tom. His mom, Jen, said it was one of his favorite things to do. Courtesy of Jen Stopka

"This gives parents the autonomy and dignity to have a say in what they give their kids for Christmas," Smith said.

Each child will also receive a coat, clothes and two to three toys. Any toys left over are saved for the following holiday season.

Donated items should be new and unwrapped. Jen said the most requested items include bikes, tablets, Nerf guns, gift cards and My Generation dolls.

Every year, the Stopkas also donate a drivable Jeep, which was Tommy's favorite toy.

Once the toys are received, the family loads a box truck and delivers the items to Tri-City Salvation Army for distribution.

"What started as a way for the family to privately memorialize Tommy has grown into a larger group of people who want to honor his life. It is a beautiful thing," Smith said. "We are incredibly appreciative."

Tommy Stopka loved to make people laugh. He continues to bring joy to other kids thanks to the toy drive his parents have organized in his memory. Courtesy of Jen Stopka

Bringing a smile to kids' faces fits right in with Tommy's personality.

"Tommy was a ball of energy," Jen said. "He would do anything to get you to laugh. He never sat still, and he was just the happiest guy."

And they are hoping to keep bringing that same joy to other kids for years to come.

"We're grateful for any donations to help keep his memory alive," Jen said. "We want to keep bringing happiness to the community in his name since he can't on his own."

• • •

To donate to Toys for Tommy

Trellis Farm and Garden locations:• 2N492 Kirk Road, St. Charles: 8 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, 10 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday, 8 a.m. to 6 p.m. Monday to Friday

• 40W296 Wasco Road, Campton Hills: 9 a.m. to 3 p.m. Saturday, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, 9 a.m. to 6 p.n. Monday to Friday

Amazon registry gift list:• www.amazon.com/registries/custom/2YK9BD757SLDI/guest-view, or search Toys for Tommy

Tri-City Salvation Army:• 1710 S. Seventh Ave. in St. Charles

Article Comments

Article Comments

Guidelines: Keep it civil and on topic; no profanity, vulgarity, slurs or personal attacks. People who harass others or joke about tragedies will be blocked. If a comment violates these standards or our terms of service, click the "flag" link in the lower-right corner of the comment box. To find our more, read our FAQ.