Some friendships have a season and a reason

"Let's make three shelters as memorials, one for you, one for Moses and one for Elijah."

- Mark 9:5

My friend was grieving over the loss of a friendship. She said she tries hard to make all her friendships last a lifetime.

I mentioned that famous line, "Friends come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime."

Having Godly values of love and friendship, I used to think we should hang on to everyone in our life, too. Through life circumstances, I've observed God doesn't intend for everyone in our lives to be a forever friend.

Many people feel friendship is special, because in most cases we can pick and choose our friends. But when I look back at my life's path, I realize God placed even the ones I picked there for a reason.

It can be for any reason. It's an inclusive list that never ends, and is specific for your life alone. The duration of the relationship can be long or short, but it offers a life lesson of significant value.

I reminisce about teachers in my life and how each impacted me. Some were good and helped me learn a lot - academically, socially and spiritually. Others were not so nice and caused me to discover what I didn't want my behavior to mirror.

Over the years, I had some amazing bosses who noticed my strengths and weaknesses and gave me positions that molded and shaped my career and life path. Some of the positions they offered were a perfect fit for my skills and personality, so I stayed for years. Others not so much, so I left quickly. Yet, all helped me to learn my own likes, dislikes and strengths.

In my teen years, I had a friend who was my neighbor and classmate. But whenever I was around her she'd put me down; I didn't like having my feelings hurt, so it didn't take me long to end the relationship. Maybe the reason was to teach me about unhealthy friends.

Seasonal friends can come and go. Many of them have been classmates, neighbors or co-workers. Some can sharpen us. Some are the sandpaper God uses to smooth our rough nature and mature us along the way as we cope with the challenging behaviors of others.

Some seasonal friends leave our lives due to certain circumstances. I've had several friendship breakups because they moved away. One got married. Another divorced. Others got new jobs in other states.

For a few, I accepted it because I realized I outgrew them. Yet some I grieved, because we had a lot in common, complemented and cared for one another. Sometimes I didn't always understand why a breakup occurred. Other times, breakups taught me many things about choices.

The unusual blessing of lifetime friends is few and far between. Some people have a few lifelong friendships and others have none. I have had one friend since the fifth grade. I have another I've known for 40-some years. But most of my friends have come and gone.

When Jesus was at "the mount of transfiguration," he was spiritually transformed when two ancient prophets mysteriously appeared. Observing this, the disciple Peter wanted to pitch a tent so they could stay. But Jesus quickly informed Peter they weren't meant to. These two men were there for a reason and a short season.

Sometimes we never really know for sure what reason, season or timing a friendship holds for us. But trusting God allowed them to happen can reassure us that somehow they all fit into his grand plan for our life.

• Annettee Budzban is a Christian author, speaker, life coach and nurse. She can be contacted at annetteebudzban@aol.com or (847) 543-8413.