O'Donnell: Mega-million Saudi golf tour perfect for money-driven poseurs like Mickelson
THE LACE CURTAIN IRISH on the West Side of Cleveland used to have an enduring life lesson they'd pass on to their children and their children's children:
"Your last friend in life will be the buck."
The buck ... money.
See how they run.
SO NOW, A SEGMENT of domestic and international media is spinning out of control over the Saudi-funded LIV Golf tour.
And this would be because a group of committed capitalists who shop at Sheikh Garments is luring another group of committed capitalists who sand-wedge Peter Pan lives to play in a series of mega-money golf tournament spanning the globe.
Forget about human rights. Forget about Jamal Khashoggi and lingering suspicions about 9/11. Forget about the suppression of women and the LGBTQ community on the Arabian Peninsula.
It's money that matters.
The buck.
Isn't it all so 21st century?
THE FRONT AND CENTER STATUS of Phil Mickelson guarantees the "King Rat" implications of the Saudi startup.
Have the gods of golf ever created a more prominent weasel?
The only TV coverage of the inaugural event will be on YouTube and Facebook. Veteran soccer commentator Arlo White - most recently of NBC Sports and the Chicago Fire FC - will anchor.
The Saudis will probably eventually plug that gap in TV coverage by funding their own Golf Channel, or buying the current one.
THE FIRST SEASON of the eight-tournament tour hits the Chicago area in mid-September when Jerry Rich - the eminent Northern Illinois University athletics donor - opens up his lush Rich Harvest Farms near Sugar Grove for another $25M tournament.
It's all just business. And golf. And reimaging for a murderous, fabulously wealthy sovereign regime.
See how they run.
• • •
"SOMEONE" LET IT SLIP that this week marked the 40th anniversary of Steve Stone's debut on ABC's "Monday Night Baseball."
Word of that watershed "Play ball!" prompted restrained jubilation on NBC Sports Chicago and at Guaranteed Rot Field Tuesday night and enabled Stone, 74, to yak on about his most familiar topic.
That, of course, would be Steve Stone.
BETWEEN THE PRONOUNS, the fellow deserves acknowledgment.
He has a superior baseball mind. He has thrived and survived through turns alongside Harry Caray, Chip Caray, Hawk Harrelson and now Jason Benetti.
He is a long way from his Clutch Cargo debut on WGN-Channel 9 way back in 1983.
That's when he was as animated as a mushroomed Grateful Dead fan exiting a five-hour concert.
BUT STONE'S UNSPOKEN SUBTEXT in select interviews these past few days was most intriguing.
He Morse-coded that he can't tell the whole truth about the current White Sox and the Wynken and Blynken and Nod of Tony La Russa.
That's too bad.
He knows he will never again attempt to touch the broadcast honesty of Jimmy Piersall.
Like the sadly neutered Ozzie Guillen, Stone just wants to play out the direct deposits being one of Jerry's kids.
STREET-BEATIN': George McCaskey and Ted Phillips may be receiving 50 inquiries about the next round of Bears' radio rights but the organization's play-by-play is not leaving Audacy's Chicago cluster. Even the diminished signal of WBBM-AM (780) is offset by the content simulcast on WCFS-FM (105.9). ...
Brent Musburger is over and out as radio game-caller for the Las Vegas Raiders. They will be holding no tag days for the 83-year-old dynamo: His family and the masterful Bill Adee did very well, thank you, on the sale of Vegas Stats and Info to DraftKings. ...
Drew Brees is officially gone after one season at NBC Sports - too much, too quickly with no time to reboot after his retirement from the Saints. Maybe after a little rest, he can star in a remake of "Number One," the 1969 Charlton Heston forgettable about a New Orleans QB at the end of the line.
Speaking of stinkers, Saturday's Belmont on NBC carries all the marquee of Stephen A. Smith opening in a New Haven revival of "Macbeth." Kentucky Derby winner Rich Strike is scheduled to go but his connections will not get the odds nor torrid pace of Louisville. ...
Nice playoffs double by young Chicago Wolves reserve goalie Pyotr Kochetkov: He won a Stanley Cup game for Carolina in relief of Antti Raanta last month and just notched his first victory for the Wolves in Game 2 of the WC Finals vs. Stockton. (Game 4 is on AHLTV.com Friday at 9 p.m.) ...
And Stephen Colbert, on rumors about Pope Francis ending his pontificate: "Oh, we've heard this before. He says he's retiring and next thing you know, he's taking the Buccaneers to the Super Bowl."
• Jim O'Donnell's Sports and Media column appears Thursday and Sunday. Reach him at jimodonnelldh@yahoo.com.