Where single moms can find support, help in the Tri-Cities

A single mom in our neighborhood pulled out of her driveway one morning, and my thought was this: She had a nice car.

Yes, it was a stereotype of sorts. My impression had always been that single mothers likely struggled to keep their cars running properly and looking nice - and maybe their homes and other belongings as well.

That's not always the case just because one is single, of course, and it's an area in which married couples can also struggle. But it has to be more challenging for those single moms because there is no spouse to share responsibilities.

"You're right on with those thoughts," said Sara Zimmerman, a therapist at TriCity Family Services and facilitator of the agency's Single Moms Support Group.

"In our culture, even beyond single moms, people are trying to figure out how to create their own extended families and community to help each other out, so we are not so isolated," Zimmerman added.

Single moms can experience the feeling of being isolated because they don't have the in-home adult partner to share the load, Zimmerman said.

As such, TriCity Family Services and other agencies in the area reach out to a network of volunteers and organizations that can help with needs such as car repairs or home repairs - though neither is always easy to secure.

Lazarus House executive director Leanne Deister-Goodwin points to St. John Neumann Church in St. Charles and Two Rivers Head Start in Aurora as entities that supply various helping hands.

"Not all single moms are struggling, but things get sketchy for those in the lower socio-economic status or who don't have a family of their own," Deister-Goodwin said. "Or some are in recovery and have burned a lot of bridges."

Lazarus House created an "Empowerment Fund" in which donors provide money to be used for individuals in need.

"We have purchased three cars for single moms," Deister-Goodwin said. "In our case management, we spend a lot of time on budgeting strategies and tools. But if you are spending $500 to $700 over a period of time for Uber to get to work or get kids to school, that is not budgeting."

That special fund helped purchase a car for a single mom who had baby twins and, multiple times a day was piling her bags, a stroller, baby seats and kids' stuff into an Uber car just to do daily tasks.

Joanne Spitz of Batavia, who heads up the CHIP IN organization and works with various other charitable efforts, works her network of contacts to try to help single moms when the call for that help comes to her.

The Batavia school district, St. Vincent de Paul, the United Way and others can generally find ways to provide some help.

"CHIP IN has gotten a family new tires for a truck and also helped purchase a car," Spitz said. "We have also found furniture and beds for families."

Spitz said it is also common for her to share information about various programs like Bikes for Batavia, a free Christmas breakfast at the Double Yolk restaurant, and the prom dress giveaway.

"We often decide who should do what part in helping with rent, budgeting help, fixing a car, or other situations," she added.

Single moms wanting more information about the support group at TriCity Family Services can contact Zimmerman at the agency at (630) 232-1070.

Not in Kansas anymore: So, do I dress up like a Munchkin or go a little more conservative with a suit? I probably won't decide until the last minute, but either way, we're looking forward to the Emerald City Gala on Saturday, March 21, at the Q Center in St. Charles.

This "Wizard of Oz"-themed event will be this year's annual fundraiser for TriCity Family Services.

More than 400 people attended the gala last year, and the agency is hoping the "Wizard of Oz" touch will bring in even more this year.

Ron Onesti, president and CEO of the Arcada Theatre, will serve as emcee, and the night also honors recipients of the Golden Heart Awards - Mike and Betsy Penny, the Geneva Women's Club, and the Richard H. Driehaus Charitable Lead Trust.

Registration for the gala is being taken at tricityfamilyservices.org.

It's about respect: It's simply about respect for his elders. "Nothing more, nothing less," said Colin Smith, owner of Balmoral Restaurant in Campton Hills.

That's how Smith answers the question of why he would close his restaurant for a day and potentially lose thousands of dollars. He shows that respect for elders by hosting the Balmoral Seniors Day when he closes the restaurant to the general public and offers seniors a free meal.

Balmoral hosted that event late last month, and more than 200 seniors attended. "I would like to thank my fantastic chefs, my waiting staff and our bagpiper," Smith said.

Yes, he had a bagpiper playing for entertainment. Don't forget this restaurant touts the "Scottish Dining Experience."

"Together, they worked as a team, and they could not have made Balmoral Restaurant any prouder for the food quality and service provided," he added. "It's important that we learn to give back in some way; this is what community is all about."

The reward for Smith is hearing stories from those in attendance, reminding him about the goodness that exists in many people.

"I heard stories of the time in their past, that this was how they remember growing up - people helping people," Smith said. "Not because they had to, but because they wanted to. Their doors were open to strangers who sometimes fell on hard times, and a home-cooked meal was all they needed to carry on."

It was about bonnets: One could say this is a throwback to an earlier time, but I have always equated Easter as a time for the ladies to show off new bonnets. Yes, that used to happen with great regularity.

It's what Batavia MainStreet has in mind as well in offering an Easter Bonnet Contest during the annual Egg Hop on Saturday, April 11, at the Riverwalk Pavilion.

Children and adults can enter the contest by registering on the downtownbatavia.com website.

Those who enter a homemade bonnet don't have to be present for the judging. Bonnets can be dropped off at the pavilion between 10 and 11:45 a.m. before judges start reviewing entries, the day of the event.

A busy Cravings: It was early on a Sunday evening, mainly because we like to be finished with our dinner by the time "60 Minutes" comes on at 6 p.m., but Cravings Noodle and Rice in downtown Geneva had a good flow of customers.

That didn't surprise me, having heard from several people that this new Taiwanese restaurant at 113 W. State St. is quite good. I've sort of lost track of the different restaurants I have visited at this site over the past few decades, but we're hoping this one has a little staying power.

The chicken fried noodles and egg rolls hit the spot and, in fact, provided me with enough food to eat for a few days.

My stomach generally gets angry if food is too spicy, so I had to ask for the hot stuff to be cut back just a bit. But I suspect a lot of people would like that particular dish with its allotted amount of firepower.

Some Italian fare: A reader dropped a note to say how much she and her husband liked the Paradiso Italian restaurant on the west side of St. Charles, in particular saying the pizza and pasta were terrific.

Paradiso is at 2051 Lincoln Hwy., in the shopping strip that also has the Salvation Army store and the Planet Fitness center. However, we noticed something the last time we went by Paradiso that the reader also mentioned. From Lincoln Highway, there is little indication the restaurant is in that strip.

The sign on the restaurant, which has the colors of the Italian flag, also downplays the name by stating "Restaurant and Bar" more prominently than Paradiso. That's sort of like diners in past decades that had "Eat" on the outdoor sign.

The word about good Italian food usually has a way of spreading, so here's to hoping Paradiso attracts a few more customers who might not otherwise be lured in by a sign.

dheun@sbcglobal.net