Use prayer, intuition when making important decisions
"Plans fail without advice; but with many counselors they are confirmed".
- Proverbs 15:22 (NIV)
One of the best pieces of advice I ever heard was, "Be cautious about following the advice of people who have nothing to lose."
On our life journey, we have many problems to solve. In our daily conversations, we come across people in our lives offering their advice to help us. This can pose a problem because, most of the time, the people offering advice have little to no experience or education to lean on regarding our problem or decision.
They come off like an authority, but truth be known, if they were faced with our problem, they might not do as well.
I have seen disaster after disaster when someone who had no idea what they were talking about gave bad advice. One happened years ago in my own family. After my mother's death, my father was devastated. Coming home to an empty house after work was more than he could handle.
A well-meaning family member stepped in with their advice regarding the situation. They shared that it was best for him to sell his house so he wouldn't have to be surrounded by the memories contained there. Now, this could be a good solution in some cases, but that was not so in this case. He sold his house way too fast and took a huge loss on his property.
The next piece of advice was to abandon his car because it was a lemon. Following this guidance left my dad with a car loan he still had to pay back and no vehicle.
Although my dad usually made wise decisions, in the wake of his grief, he listened because it was someone he loved and trusted. This well-meaning relative had no experience or knowledge in any of these areas, and the rest of our family couldn't figure out what our relative meant by any of this advice. Fortunately, my dad bounced back quickly. But he still suffered some consequences.
There are many examples of how following the advice of someone who has nothing to lose can lead to problems. I imagine many of you have some stories of your own.
The Bible says it is wise to get the advice of more than one person. But how do we do this? First, let me say I realize that's not always possible. Sometimes the situation is too personal to share with several people. And in this day and age, finding people you can trust or are who wise enough could be difficult. But when you can, wisdom points to this direction. Here's a few examples to direct you when searching for advice.
When unsure consider a second opinion. As a nurse, I realize health professionals understand this concept, as doctors will often refer patients for the opinion of another doctor. I have seen patients make that choice themselves when facing difficult health challenges.
Keep in mind, a wise adviser whether a friend or professional, has been there done that and has learned a lot from their own experience or has an educational background and expertise. Don't misunderstand - it's not that a friend can't have good advice, but not all friends give good advice.
Seek different types of advisers. You might also consider spiritual counsel for your problem besides practical advice.
Remember, wise advice should make sense. For example, in the case of major losses, experts suggest someone should wait a year before making any major decisions. When that's not possible, they should make sure they are not just being led by their feelings.
When I'm life-coaching others, I try to follow these same examples. I lean heavily on spiritual knowledge with practical biblical examples, my professional education as a nurse, and a variety of life experiences I've gleaned wisdom from over the years.
And, yet, one most important thing I've learned above and beyond the advice of any earthly advisers, using prayer and following our own intuition and God's advice is best.
• Annettee Budzban is an author, speaker life coach and nurse. She can be contacted at Annetteebudzban@aol.com or (847) 543-8413.