Sadness is real for you - and your cat - when a pet passes
Those of you who regularly read the Buddy Beat know that I am no stranger in giving out feline advice, but sometimes, when it comes to my own felines, and myself, I am at a loss.
I mean that in the most sincere way. I'm talking about how I am dealing with the loss of one of my felines and how to address my other felines' broken bonds. They are sad, just like I am, and but those signs may be more subtle.
First, even if you have a community of pet lovers to help you with the loss, don't be that person everyone avoids. The reality is, your community is that small. Most people don't have an outlet to express their grief. The loss of a favorite feline may not be given much notice by some family and friends. They may make you feel like you should "get over it already." It wasn't a human loss, and they may make you feel that your loss is trivial.
But the loss is real!
You can make yourself feel better with a tribute to your animal, and sometimes, what you first decide to do may not satisfy you later. You are entitled to a "do over."
For example, I brought my favorite feline home in an urn that looked like him. After months of looking at it, I decided I had not done enough for his memory and not enough for the felines that felt his loss. So, daily, I thought of all the things he did that I cherished. But, it almost made the loss worse. Then I decided to write them each day until the list was exhausted. You can imagine, I had quite a list. Rereading it was cathartic. I felt better and it helped me to help my grieving felines and their odd behaviors.
Feeling their friend's loss, they needed coaxing to eat and play. Their behaviors became disoriented. Several ran around the house looking for him in all the places he would play or sleep. I even added special treats and foods as a distraction.
Animals really feel a loss at the level we do. They need time to adjust and cope. My felines may now be taking advantage of me, as they sit at the bottom of the stairs and meow to be carried up.
Also, I am doing a "do over" for my beloved boy. I have printed every photo I have ever taken of him as a memorial. I will do several things with these photos. I will have a portrait made of him in both crystal and canvas. He will also have a remembrance at The Buddy Foundation building so everyone will know how special he was. Lastly, somewhere in the world a tree will be planted in his honor to combat global warming and ever-changing environment - my favorite feline will leave his global imprint.
Today's Buddy Beat was written with a hope to assist anyone who is sad about the loss of a beloved pet. Just know you are not alone in your loss. How you decide to honor this pet is for you and your family to decide, without embarrassment. When you are ready for a new Buddy, please visit our shelter. We will understand your loss and support you.
Fundraising
• Remember today is Paws in the Park, the Buddy Foundation's eighth annual charity dog walk. The event starts at 9 a.m. at Melas Park, 1500 W. Central Road, in Mount Prospect. Join us, there will be demonstrations, raffle prizes and vendors with products for dogs and people. Walk your dog around the track to help raise money and awareness for Buddy's animals. Registration is $35. For information, visit thebuddyfoundation.org. Hope to see you there!
Upcoming
• Bowling for Buddy is coming. Watch here for details.
• The Buddy Foundation, 65 W. Seegers Road, Arlington Heights, is an all-volunteer, nonprofit organization with all funds directly assisting its animals. Its mission is to provide immediate safety and care to stray and abandoned cats and dogs. Call (847) 290-5806 or visit www.thebuddyfoundation.org.