Father’s Day reflections on the important job of parenting

While reading recently about the sad passing of endearing Hall of Fame slugger Harmon Killebrew, we came across this comment he once expressed:

“My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, ‘You’re tearing up the grass!’ ‘We’re not raising grass,’ Dad would reply. ‘We’re raising boys.’”

In reading those words, how many of you found yourself, like us, quietly smiling because the nostalgic charm of it reminded you somehow of your own father?

(Let us bask only momentarily in that warm thought today.)

Despite all of the advantages men have as a gender in this society, it nonetheless isn’t easy being a man. Men die younger, tend to suppress non-anger emotions, generally bear the burdens of failures in solitude, stereotypically are assigned blame for most of society’s ills, and often develop sadly more distant relationships with their children.

On the one hand, men are told to be tough. On the other, they are grilled about why they can’t open up. On the one hand, men often are assigned the role of family disciplinarian. On the other, they are directed to express more affection. On the one hand, men are raised to work hard and to make something of themselves. On the other, they are asked why they’re never home.

No, it isn’t easy being a man.

It is even more difficult being a father. (And tougher still for the many men who fall into the role almost accidentally or at least without giving it much advance thought.)

But let us say this: Being a good parent, whether father or mother, is the most important and the most rewarding job in life. What else, at the end of the day, truly compares to the love and happiness of our children?

Amazingly, as difficult as it is to be a good father, all sorts of men succeed at it, as one testimonial after another would indicate. If we all don’t have fathers we would emulate, most of us at least certainly know of others who do. The fathers who love, advise, inspire and provide unconditional acceptance.

An interesting article on wikihow.com outlines eight steps to becoming a good father, and while we don’t consider them by any means comprehensive, they provide a good start:

1) Have fun. 2) Spend time and take responsibility for your children. 3) Be a teacher by both word and example. 4) Show affection. 5) Respect your children’s mother. 6) Don’t place unreasonable expectations on your children. 7) Don’t place unreasonable expectations on yourself. 8) Realize that a father’s job is never done.

We commend the full article to you at wikihow.com/Be-a-Good-Father.

Meanwhile, to all the good fathers and aspiring good fathers out there, may we today say thanks for your important work. And happy Father’s Day.