Line between tantrums and serious mental health issue can be thin

Chicago Cubs pitcher Carlos Zambrano may be the latest athlete to lose his temper, but he's far from the only one.

Ex-Cub Milton Bradley could have starred in his own sports highlights film for temper tantrums. Former Bears Coach Mike Ditka once spat at a fan.

But athletes can also become models of reform. Former Chicago Bulls player Ron Artest had problems in the past with drinking and fighting, but after he won an NBA championship with the Los Angeles Lakers this month, he publicly thanked his psychologist.

Zambrano, at one time the Cubs' ace, was suspended Friday for throwing a tantrum in the dugout. Beginning today, Zambrano will be evaluated by two doctors for what is presumed to be an anger management issue.

Anger management teaches how to recognize what pushes your buttons before you blow up and to respond in ways to resolve the conflict, not to escalate it.

Anger is a normal, healthy emotion, psychologists say, but when it hurts others unfairly, it crosses the line.

That fire inside helps make Zambrano one of the best pitchers in the game when he's on, but when he misdirects it at umpires and teammates, it's counterproductive, said Mitchell Bruski, chief executive officer at the Kenneth Young Center in Elk Grove Village, which provides counseling services.

Misdirected competitiveness is why Bruski, an amateur softball player, quit his team. They started out as a terrible team whose members had fun playing, and transformed into a good team that got into fights.

Now Bruski is considering joining a vintage baseball team, following the earliest rules of the game, in which players compliment opponents on a good play and never argue with the umpire.

One good role model is Detroit Tigers pitcher Armando Galarraga, who recently lost a perfect game because of an umpire's bad call, but was mature enough to shrug off the mistake. Yet no amount of anger management training in the world will help, Bruski says, if the participant doesn't buy in.

"It's like the joke about the social worker," Bruski said. "How many social workers does it take to change a light bulb? One - but the bulb has to want to change."

Anger management is a part of every counseling program offered at Alexian Brothers Behavioral Health Hospital in Hoffman Estates.

Linda Lewaniak, director of outpatient services, says clients are taught coping skills, like taking a timeout when they start getting angry. The timeout may be just taking a moment before speaking, taking three deep breaths, or walking away to rethink the situation.

One technique is to rate the importance of the problem on a scale from one to five, then rate what your response should be, so you're not treating spilled milk like the BP oil spill.

"Anger is a cover-up for things that are underneath," Lewaniak said, "like stress, depression or overwork."

So, she said, try to react only to the matter at hand, then try to address the larger issues to minimize chronic problems.

Sometimes, quelling outbursts requires stepping out of your automatic responses as a spouse, parent or worker, and seeing the situation from someone else's point of view.

Cindy Travnicek, a counselor with Naperville Clinical Services, holds weekly group classes, in which members can share stories and get a broader perspective about what ticks them off.

"One of them said, 'You sound just like my wife,' and the other said, 'Oh my gosh, you sound just like my husband,'" she said. "They understood it in a deeper way when it wasn't coming through their spouse."